Easter

I hope you all had a wonderful Resurrection Day! We went to the Sunrise service that our chapel had, it was short, but beautiful. We were able to come home and immediately Chad hid eggs out in the backyard and the kids had fun finding eggs, even sweet Noah joined in! The night before after we dyed them both of the older boys drew pictures of the 3 crosses on Good Friday. Let me tell you how blessed it is to see your children shining the TRUTH, knowing the TRUTH, knowing and loving Jesus. We had a couple friends over for dinner and dinner was so good! :) I made a turkey, ham, dressing, homemade noodles, mashed potatoes and gravy (from the turkey broth..yum!), and veggies. Our friend M made baked beans which were seriously awesome and I'm not normally a fan of them! Our other friend A brought cupcakes, and Chad and M made deviled eggs! Dinner was awesome!


The day was truly blessed as we thanked the Lord for his sacrifice and for his fulfillment of the scriptures. It's truly so humbling to think of all he went through for me and for you to be allowed to enter the Kingdom of HEAVEN. On Friday (Good Friday that is) our chapel did a short service, dinner, and then showed The Passion of the Christ. We own the movie, but the last time we watched it was 7 years ago. I remember sobbing and hiding my face through a good portion of it. I've felt the Lord whispering that it was time that I was reminded just what he went through for me. It's not a movie that can be taken lightly. It's not a movie that just anyone can watch, and I think you need to be prepared. There's no way to prepare your heart, but be prepared to have your heart moved beyond measure when you see exactly what he went through for you. It's humbling and heartbreaking. If you've never seen it, I urge you to watch it. If you've not watched it in a while...I encourage you to pray and see if the Lord is calling you to watch it once again. Jacob wants to watch it, but I just don't feel like he's quite ready for it. It's so graphic and although it's true, I just want him to be mature enough and truly ready to watch it. I think in a couple more years he'll be ready, but we'll keep seeking God's wisdom on when to expose him to this harsh reality.
With that, I'm ending with pictures that I've taken over the last couple of weeks. Lots of Noah and quite a few from Easter. Be blessed.



Emma with our friend "M"'s dog, Skittle...taking her for a little bike ride


Emma getting her nails painted by her big brother, Jacob




Emma decorating a cookie

Jacob and Jackson...my handsome boys

My world

Excited to see their Easter baskets!!!

This is my favorite photo of Noah and Chad!

My sweet Noah

Loving swinging

Noah and his big brother, Jacob

Getting some loving from Jackson

Tired!!

I'm wiped out and I wish I could say that I'll get some downtime soon, but that's not going to happen until we're done with school. We have daily school of course....and well let me just lay it out for you! Sunday's: Church and AWANA (normally we come home from church, have a simple lunch, go over the kids AWANA verses, let the kids play outside for about 30 minutes to an hour and then it's time to leave). Home and dinner and then time for bed for the kids. Monday: School, Jacob has Cub Scouts, Jack has baseball practice, Emma has ballet, and I go to Zumba in the evening, so I leave Noah and Emma with Chad and Jacob (Chad's the coach for Jackson's team) Tuesday: School, Praise Team Practice, Jacob baseball practice, and I have Zumba Wednesday: PWOC, (the boys do school during PWOC) come home have lunch and finish up any school that wasn't finished during the morning, Jackson has cub scouts, I have Zumba Thursday: School and Jacob has baseball practice, Jackson's baseball games Friday: School and Hospitality House Saturday: Finish any school work that was not finished (yes even school on Saturday's if necessary) Jacob's baseball games. Of course we have to squeeze in errands, shopping, and various other things. I do NOT like this schedule at all. I honestly can't stand it. I do not like being on the go constantly. I do not like feeling like we're over taxed. I do not like having no down time and right now we have NONE...oh wait we do have Saturday evenings! LOL So want to pray for me? Seriously I absolutely COVET any and all prayers you'll be saying for me. Life's not bad, oh no not at all...just exceptionally busy. I do think praying for each other is vital and when we're seeking the Lord in all steps of our life, we'll feel him every step of the way. So yes, as you can see though...I'm tired! I'm a bit wiped out! Oh and lets not forget I have a 10 month old thrown into this mix, who's hobby is nursing! LOL I joke, but I'm pretty serious about that! Somewhere in all of this, I've been working hard on laundry and working hard to trying to keep up on housework, although I'm not doing the best job there. All my floors except the kitchen have been swept and mopped between yesterday and today (tomorrow is the kitchen and will do the bathroom's, again). You know though, through all this busyness....I'm relying on God to get me through it that much more. I'm thankful for this time in our lives. I'm thankful we're able to enjoy watching our boys play baseball and seeing them enjoy themselves. I'm thankful that Emma gets to do ballet and the best part, it's not breaking the bank! (Come on, can't I get a whoot-whoot out of THAT one?!!!). I'm loving my time with Noah. He's such a happy boy. He's a laid back little guy. He enjoys his siblings so much, loves his Daddy, and is in love with me. He smiles so easily and laughs often. He's showing a bit of ornryness in his personality, and there's just such joy in his heart!!!! With that, my bed is calling my name. I have to be up early for PWOC in the morning. I love this midweek special time with our Lord and fellowship with sisters in Christ. I'm not thrilled about the early wake up! LOL No really I don't mind it too much, most Wednesday mornings. Next year I will Not be on the board and well honestly I'm thankful for that. I'm thankful that God's preparing a quieter time for me. I will say though, that I enjoy my position on the board this year. I'm the Prayer Coordinator, and love it. I have a heart for prayer and believe that it's absolutely necessary. Without prayer we have no communication with the Lord. We should be talking to him constantly, we don't have to get down on our knees to communicate with God. We can be driving and talking to him, doing dishes, taking a shower, laying in bed, sitting on the computer, sitting at baseball practice.....we can talk out loud or in our heads. We can pray with others or alone. There's no right or wrong with to pray, when you're truly going to Jesus....fully and completely. So now is time to go spend with the Lord as he helps me drift off to sleep. We're blessed my friends. We have a Savior who loved us so much that he died for us. Oh how blessed we are. Here's to sweet dreams! (PS if I am all over in this, please accept my apologies...I've struggled to keep my eyes open writing this)

My God!!

My God is the same whether the government pays us or not. My God is the same whether the Government shuts down or keeps going. My God is the same. He never changes. He loves me unconditionally. He's the great physician. He's my Father. He's my hope through today and for tomorrow. He loved me the moment I was formed in my mothers womb, and he'll love me the day I join him in Heaven. My God is the same and nothing can change that. He is the ONE consistent in this life. We only have to start talking/praying to him. We only have to open our bibles and read his promises. Sometimes we ask him something and his answer is no and sometimes it is yes, while other times it's simply "not yet". Through it all though, my GOD is the same! He loves me more passionately than I could ever imagine loving another, and that includes my own children. He wants the best for me. He'll never forsake me or leave me. How thankful I am that through all the turmoil that's happening in our nation, I have the hope and promise of my Lord, My Savior!

Ultimate Blog Party (a little late)

So I'm late to the party! I'd like to say Fashionably late, but well I'm not the most fashionable girl, so I'll just say I'm late, I have kids, a hubby, homeschool, bible study, ballet class (for Emma), baseball practices, cleaning a house, taking care of a dog (that I only sort of like), oh and lets not get started on the stinking laundry (it IS my nemesis). So a little about myself for those who are new here, I guess read the above and you'll get a good portion of who I am! Lets start with the absolute, positively most important thing about me....I am a Christian! I believe that Jesus Christ is the Lord, he's my Savior, and I am absolutely nothing without him. I believe that unless you believe in him you will NOT be going to Heaven. I believe that if you have any other "ideas" of him you're wrong, you're not going to Heaven, and my heart truly aches for you. Next.....I'm the wife of Chad who happens to be a Soldier in the US ARMY. We just celebrated 14 years of marriage. We've had all sorts of ups and downs. We are about to go through our 6th Deployment. He was in an awful accident this past August, is truly blessed to have survived, it's amazing that he's walking, etc. He broke his left clavicle bone, tore his 7-11th vertabrae's, and fractured his sternum. He had surgery 3 days after the accident, they placed a titanium rod in his shoulder and one in his back, (sternum healed on its own). We went to see his surgeon almost 2 weeks ago and praise the LORD he's completely healed!!!! With that healing means he'll join his unit, which is already deployed here shortly. (I will not post the date for his safety). We have been blessed with 5 children so far! Jordyn would have turned 13 on March 30, yes would have is correct. When she was 2 years old she went home to Heaven. She was diagnosed with AML leukemia when she was 6 days from turning 1 year old. She fought so hard, but ultimately the Lord declared that her work was finished and she was mercifully taken home on May 8, 2000. We of course miss her, wonder what she'd be like, what she'd look like, etc but oh to know my sweet little girl is safe in the arms of Jesus, there's nothing more reassuring! We also have: Jacob:10, Jackson:7, Emma: 3, and Noah who's 10 months old (not sure how that's possible, because he was JUST born!! No seriously he was!). We homeschool our children. The Lord called our family to it and although it can be absolutely challenging, it's also a blessing! We have been homeschooling since Jacob was in kindergarten (so from the beginning). This year instead of me piecing their curc. I decided to go with Alpha Omega's Life Pac's! We love it! God is in everything, every subject from the beginning of time to now! Oh I guess I forgot to tell you where we're blessed to live. Germany! We have been here for almost 6 years and LOVE it! I truly feel so at home here. I can't describe it in words how much I love it here. I feel like this is where GOD wants us. We have been blessed to travel and see so many amazing places and hope to see many more before we're forced to move back stateside. My interests....PWOC (Protestant Women of the Chapel....aka Women's bible study that was started 56 years ago in Germany from some Army spouses who wanted fellowship time with fellow spouses). Reading (my favorites are Christian Fiction and Nonfiction, Nonfiction in General, History, travel books, and my favorite: The Bible...truly the greatest book ever written!). I love taking pictures of my children, although I would love to learn more in photography! I love antiques and have acquired a few beautiful pieces since living in Germany. I've become a lover of Zumba and working on getting healthier and thinner this year! Traveling, I love it and thrive on it! I can't wait for our next adventure and discovery! My favorite place so far is hands down: Ireland! So very beautiful, amazing, and just a striking country! So leave me a comment, and I look forward to getting to know you! God's Blessings

I have hope that tomorrow my heart won't hurt so much. I have hope that one day I'll be with my beautiful Jordyn again. I have hope because, Jesus Christ is my Savior. Today instead of me hugging and kissing and wishing Jordyn a happy birthday and celebrating 13 years of life....I know she's safe in the arms of Jesus. Chad and I are still not sure what we're going to do today for her birthday celebration. I had PWOC this morning, I led our worship team and prayed and cried. Chad stayed home this morning with the kids since Emma wasn't feeling well when she woke up (I think it was just allergy junk though). He has to go to the memorial service of two of our fallen soldiers from our Battalion who were killed last Tuesday in Afganistan. I'm not going to the memorial service, it's too hard and today's hard enough, plus at 4 I have Noah's well baby apt. and Jack has cub scouts. So although it'd be easiest to climb in bed, have a good hard cry, and sleep....God's made my life so that it won't work like that. I am strugging right at this moment to find joy, I have it, it's just a little deeper in my heart today. I know that part of me wants to REJOICE and sing from the mountain tops that today 13 years ago I gave birth to the most amazing little girl ever. I AM BLESSED. I AM Thankful. I AM Loved. Happy Birthday, Jordyn. I love you to Heaven and Back (and back again a few million times). Today I became a Mommy and I can say it was TRULY the most amazing experience of my life. I'll love you forever.

14 years ago

My camera's not beside me and I'm tired and just too lazy to go get it and upload the pictures, hopefully I'll share some later! The point of this post though is that today Chad and I celebrated 14 years of marriage! I feel so blessed that this year we were able to actually go out and celebrate. We rarely do that, for one he's so often not home (deployed or out training) or just can't justify it financially to go out and do anything. This year we were able to. Chad called and made reservations for us at a steak place and it was AWESOME. I got what they call the Women's Tenderloin, it was so good! Tender and juicy. I got a side of mushrooms that were seasoned perfectly. Chad who doesn't care for mushrooms even agreed that they were good! Oh and while waiting on dinner they brought us two homemade wheat/whole grain rolls with homemade pesto sauce and wow, seriously delicious! I would go back there just for the rolls, but the steaks were just so insanely good! Now I'm a steak snob. I grew up on a farm where every year my dad would pick out his best steer and fatten him up and he'd end up in our deep freezor once big enough. So I know what a good steak should taste like. Of course it's taken me a few years of marriage to even want steak, because we ate it so much growing up (5 to 6 nights out of the week, I got pretty sick of it!). Chad has no empathy for me at all! LOL
Anyways, back to our evening! We hired a teen that we know and trust to watch the kids. Jack came in a couple hours before we were due to go out and said he was invited over for a sleep over at our neighbor who lives directly in front of us, so down one kid. Then after the babysitter arrived the mom of one of Jacob's best friends called and asked if he could spend the night....two kids gone. So she now only had Emma. We'd debated leaving Noah, but figured we'd have to come home earlier than planned to nurse him and he'd just been sort of off all day, so he went with us. He was such a good boy! After dinner we went and just walked around our beautiful city. I shared to Chad how I felt so much at HOME here in Germany, and in our beautiful city. I just love it here. The thought of having to leave makes me sick to my stomach. I know if we do, it's in God's plan for us, I just know my heart does not want to leave this place, not yet anyways. After walking around we drove to our favorite Eis shoppe (Ice cream shoppe). They were having a special on Spaghetti Eis, sweet! Now if you've never been in Germany you may not know the wonderfulness that is spaghetti eis. It's just simply ice cream pushed through a tool to look like spaghetti, topped with a cherry sauce (or strawberry), with white chocolate sprinkled to look like parmesian cheese. So good! Well they had every thought you could ever imagine for spaghetti eis tonight. I got strawberry, fresh strawberries...oh it was so very good. Chad got three different ones on a plate. We figured that they'd be much smaller servings, oh no normal sizes all 3 of them! It had vanilla (classic), strawberry, and chocolate. They were all good, and I had a couple bites of the strawberry and chocolate...some how he managed to eat them all. Of course once we got home, it hit him how miserable he was! LOL

I feel so blessed that we got to spend time together, although we had Noah with him, we just really cherished being together. Holding hands, talking, lots of laughing, and being in amazement at how fast the last 14 years have went and yet how it feels like we've always been together. I'm so thankful that God brought Chad into my life. I'm thankful that I married my best friend. That we've been blessed with 5 beautiful children. I wouldn't have wanted to go through the good or the hard times with anyone else. Deployments are hard, but reunions are so sweet. God has held us through many times when we both are hurting, he's healed hurts, show us how to grow our love, cherish the moments we have together, and reminds us how precious our time is here on Earth. We don't know what tomorrow holds for us, but for tonight I'm thankful that 14 years ago, I married the man I never knew to dream of. I married the man who had become my best friend. Who loved (s) me passionately. Who dreamed of a future with me on our first date and wasn't afraid to share with me! Who loves God fully. I'm so thankful and so very blessed. Marriage is HARD. It'd be easier to just throw it away, but it's worth all the hard work. It's worth the sweat and tears that come from it. It's a blessed union under GOD and that should never, ever be taken lightly.

I love you Chad and look forward to what God has instore for us for the rest of our lives! Here's to another 40 to 50 years!!!

Changes

Yesterday Chad and I went to see his surgeon from his accident in August (for new readers, my husband, Chad was in a very serious roll over accident in a soft top humvee that could have easily paralyzed or killed him). He had xrays done and he's completely healed up! He'll have the rods removed from his shoulder and spine in December most likely. He told him any time between June and December, but because he's being released and all restrictions are now lifted, Chad will be deploying. We don't have a date yet, but his unit is already down range and have been there for a few months, so once he's ready he'll be heading down to join his unit.
We both have peace over this and know that nothing is outside of God's will and we trust him. So deployment #6 is now looming in our near future.
We praise GOD that he healed Chad's body so completely and fully and that he's physically able to safely deploy. We are thankful for the drs, nurses, and physical therapists that God has placed in our lives over the last 7 months to help his body heal properly. It's truly amazing how Great our Great physician is and the progress he's allowed with modern medicine!
So now it's time to get ready to go back at parenting on my own again with distant "help"/"coparenting" from Afganistan. I'm not looking forward to that part at all, but again trusting God to help me. I will definitely be facilitating local/trust worthy teens to baby sit so this Momma can keep her sanity, taking up friends offers for childcare, playdates, an evening out, etc.
I'm already planning on taking the kids down to Italy this summer if I can get us a cabin. I'd like to stay down there a full 7 nights and just truly relax and enjoy ourselves, enjoy the beach, grilling, eating good Italian pizza and other dishes, and making memories and going to Florence and probably another stop over at Pisa (since we didn't have Noah last time), I'm also thinking of bringing either another adult friend with me or bringing along a teenage helper which could be a win-win for both of us....gives me extra hands and her some time on the beach! ;)

I'm now off to bed, Zumba kicked my butt tonight. I haven't been in 2 weeks after being sick the last 2 weeks. So time for some reading and shut eye.

God Bless

A Trip Down Memory Lane

Last weekend was a very emotional weekend for Chad and I. We returned to where we were stationed when Jordyn was diagnosed. We were officially stationed in Baumholder, but Chad's battalion was up in Strassburg Kaserne and we lived up there as well. Strassburg Kaserne was a 5 minute drive from a beautiful city, Idar-Oberstein. We loved going there. We would often go a couple times a week. We would often walk down there, the hill was huge and steep! We'd drive down there on our "lazy" days and then just walk around the pedestrian area, buy a pretzel, and look in all the jewelry stores. There are so many good and just precious memories stored up there, that time of our life. Those were days of being naive and innocent. The days where I thought tomorrow would come, where children didn't die, that cancer happened to OTHER people, other peoples kids were the ones with bald heads and racoon cheeks...not my little girl. Not MY Baby.





March 24, 1999 everything changed. Our lives were turned upside down and inside out. To be told 1 year after your beautiful little girl was due to be born, that she had cancer. That she had leukemia. To be told to pray for ALL leukemia and pray it's not AML Leukemia. I prayed and I believed and the next day she was transferred from Landstuhl to a German hospital, Homburg University. We were told that she had AML. Our lives changed in a moment. We took our baby to the hospital because she had croup to be told hours later that she had leukemia to be told a day later that she had the type of leukemia we were told to pray against. I only left Jordyn once to return home to pack up my clothes & Jordyn's, get our medical records, and ultimately say goodbye to our last home in which we lived a "normal" life and ventured into a new "normal". A life of chemo, anti-nausea medication, central lines, flushing of lines, etc. Our lives went from new Jordyn's new stages to what type of chemo on what day, bone marrow biopsies and spinal taps. After that one time, I never retured to our home and neither did Jordyn. Chad took the responsibility of having our apartment packed up and everything shipped to the states when we moved to Ft. Belvoir for Jordyn to be treated at Walter Reed.



So....this past weekend, we returned. I figured I'd shed some tears, but I didn't expect the emotions that came over me. I was swept back to 1999. To the days of being innocent and naive. To the days of my sweet Jordyn being a beautiful, chubby baby toddling around our apartment, loving on our cat, Cassie by laying on her...giving love to our dogs BJ and Brittany. From her happy giggles and laughter that filled our home. Days before internet was a way of life, where long walks was a daily habit, rocking and snuggles was a way of life, and tomorrow held so much promise. I never imagined in my worst nightmares what was to become Jordyn's (and our) future. I never imagined 14 months later she'd be in Heaven, just barely 2 years old, when we hadn't even celebrated her first birthday.



Tomorrow's never promised, not even for our children. So if you're a Momma (or Daddy) reading this....go snuggle, hug, and kiss those precious gifts of yours. I don't care how frustrated you might feel, how annoyed you may be, how stressed out you are because of those blessings...they ARE blessings and I'm here to tell you that tomorrow is NOT promised. The only promise you have is if you have a relationship with Jesus Christ! If you have him as your personal Savior, then you have a promise of eternity! Teach your children well! Love them, don't take them for granted. Enjoy them. Don't rush them to grow up. Relish them at what ever age/stage they're at. Just love them.

God's Blessings

Christy

little of this a little of that

Before braces (in the ortho's chair)

After/With Braces
Well Jacob has braces now, he got 6 on the top, which will remain for 6 months, they'll remove them and he'll have a retainer until he's lost enough baby teeth to continue on with the process. He was in pain for the first couple of days, but since he's not complained. He's adjusting to not being allowed certain foods, but he's not doing bad and hasn't complained.

I'm not sure if I shared that my baby, Noah is 9 months old now, actually 9 1/2 months. How quickly it's gone by. He's cruising the furniture, it's a crawling pro, and he loves to get into anything and everything!! He's also the absolute cutest thing in the entire world! He's a tad bit adored. He LOVES his brothers and sister (but looooves his bubbas). He's such a happy little guy and a big little lover! He brings so much joy and laughter into our home!

Could he be any cuter??!! He has a little bruise on his head from falling one day (hey it happens).

Jackson's doing great in his advancements with reading. It's been a challenge, until recently and now he's reading more and more, gaining more and more confidence in this new found ability! School has become so much easier with him and far less frustrating! Whew! The kid can memorize like no one's business as well. His favorite thing to do though....just play and be a boy! He's loving being in Cub Scouts. He's in the Wolf pack and is excited for Wednesday's to come, when he gets to go to his meeting! This Thursday is the boys Den meeting and they'll be getting their cars for the Pine Wood Derby! Both are excited, but Jackson's REALLY excited! It's seriously so cute!!

Jackson in downtown Idar-Oberstein

Emma, oh Emma. She recently started ballet and looooves it! I have to go this week and get her, her leotard,tutu, and ballet shoes. She is having fun and has no interest in playing sports right now, which I don't mind...one less thing to run to! She's too smart for her own good I swear. In love with Noah, loves her two older brothers, Daddy, and is still a big momma's girl! She's such a funny girl and seriously loves being the center of attention, which can come out as a little bit of jealousy when that attention is being giving to Noah at times. But you know she's a sweet girl, a little sassy at times, and keeps us on our toes and laughing often!

I'm going to write another post later about our past weekend. We went to see my friend Kandice who lives up by Ramstein. While there we went over to Idar-Oberstein (the pictures of Jack and Emma were taken there). We lived just above IO when Jordyn was alive. I will leave it at that, until later.

It's almost 3 AM and I'm still wide awake. In about 12 hours my big boy will be getting the first stage of braces on. His top 4 teeth are very messed up, so he'll be getting braces just on top and only the 4 maybe 6 teeth, in a year or maybe two (depending on how long it takes for him to loose the rest of his baby teeth) he'll get the rest of his braces. It's honestly hard to believe I have a child old enough to be getting braces. The years just fly by. Far too quickly. It seems like only yesterday that he was Noah's age. The other night we were talking about what he was doing when he was Noah's age. He went through this awful phase of banging his head against the wall. It was horrible to me. Of course I'd react, which would only encourage the behavior. When he finally stopped was when I finally stopped reacting! LOL Of course!

I read blogs of new Momma's and how they're wishing for the next phase of babyhood to get here....wishing away these precious moments, wishing away the time. I am going to just say it: STOP IT! It goes by in the blink of an eye. If you have a baby, relish it. Love it....enjoy it. You WILL long to have those days back. You'll long to hold your baby in your arms again. You'll look at your toddler and wonder how they got there. How it's possible that they're talking and running and never run out of constant energy????? Don't wish those toddler days away either. In a flash they'll be a big kid who may actually know more than you. Who may roll an eye at you, who are almost as tall as you....who just a blink ago were that infant that you were rocking to sleep in your arms. Who you nursed to sleep, and held tightly to your finger. You'll long to feel them cuddled up in your lap once again. Don't wish these days away, I promise you it goes by all too quickly.

There's nothing wrong with looking forward to the future, just don't be so focused on the future that you forget to enjoy the present! Look back on the past with fondness and smiles.

Make memories. Share laughter, hugs, and kisses. Take pictures of the mundane of your life with those little ones, so you never forget. Smell them in, take deep, life lasting smells of their heads. Never take for granted a day. It'll be over before you know it.

Most of all praise GOD for each Glorious Day. Praise Jesus that you have the Promise of Tomorrow because of his sacrifice for your life and your loved ones.....if they're believers.

Tonight as I'm heading to bed, I'll be cuddling with my 3 year old who's officially out of diapers (she's just recently night time "trained") and my 9 month old. I'm blessed and not taking a moment for granted. Tomorrow....I'll take my camera and take before and after photo's. I can't believe my "little man" is 10 and ready for braces.