I decided for the first time to join in with I ♥ Faces
This week's theme is Pouting and when I read that I KNEW the perfect picture to use:
We were officially notified tonight that Chad's unit is coming home early!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! He'll be home aprox. 45 days earlier than expected!! To some of you that may not seem like a big deal, but it's HUGE! Instead of the end of the summer, we're talking about the beginning! He'll be home for Emma's 2nd birthday and Jackson's 6th. I wasn't so worried about Jackson's birthday, but thought he'd miss out on Emma's.
I really can't believe it, well I DO believe it, but never thought it'd happen! I wasn't being pestimistic, but realistic. Anyways our new reality is that they do not need our unit as long as projected so they're bringing them home early!!!!!!!!
Ever feel like that one particular child is "going to be the death" of you? I do! Mine's named Emma Grace! She's sweet, sassy, stubborn, overbearing, beautiful, wonderful, and a mess! This morning before church she decided it was time for a trip to the ER. Yep, oh what fun!
She was running, we have hardwood floors, and she fell and hit her head and the biggest goose egg I have EVER seen in my life popped up on that childs head so fast. I did learn that, it forming so quickly is actually a good sign that most likely (note most likely) no blood clot. I had been in the bathroom when this happened, it took me about 3 seconds to get to her. Once she was calmed down I called my friend T, where Jacob was having a sleep over at with her son and sent our neighbor boys home who had slept over and was going to go to church with us, but well I was not about to take an extra child to the ER if I didn't have to...so he went home! Off Jack, Emma, and I went to the ER. May I just say that I was a wreck. Normally I'm calm and even maybe a little harsh. I'm the mom who's looking, seeing they're ok and telling them to get up and get back to playing or what ever it was they were doing before they hurt themselves. Not this morning.
I'm not sure still if she also scratched herself or if because the goose egg/bump grew so quickly her skin split. I was of sound mind to grab my camera though and I took a picture of her before taking her into the hospital. (photo to come) I get in there, she was seen with in 10 minutes and they sent us over to have a sonogram of her head. They looked and he said all was well, no bleeding or clots could be seen. Now let me explain during the first 10 minutes of waiting she was happily playing with the toys they had there, jabbering away, and running around. When we went to the kinder clinic (children's clinic) to have the sonogram, they have all kinds of things for the kids to play on and with and she was running around, loud, laughing, and having a good old time. It's about this time I started to question if I should have even brought her to the ER! LOL (Ok it wasn't a big question, I needed the piece of mind knowing she was ok!!) So she had the sonograph, and we went back to the ER waiting room, waited about 20 or so minutes, saw a different dr and he said she was ok. She had a very slight concussion, just to keep an eye on her bring her in if any signs (vomitting, intense sleepiness, confusion, acting oddly), but otherwise he sent us on our way. So by 12:30 I was pulling up to the chapel parking lot, going in and low and behold everyone knew about Emma.
My friend T had told one of the chaplains and he happened to be the one praying during service and so he asked for prayers for Emma. So in a matter of 30 minutes after Emma falling she was being prayed for by aprox. 300 people! How blessed are we? We live on a small post so I came home to messages on the answering machine from people who'd heard Emma had been hurt and were reaching out in case I needed help with the boys. Can I tell you how blessed I feel to live here? So very blessed!
So ready to see this crazy child of mine?
Yes I know her face is dirty (I washed it right after I took this and saw how disgusting she was! LOL) I took this right before I got her out of the van to take her inside to the ER. Oh by the time we left the hospital and got back to post, it was about half the size it started off with and when she went to bed it was half that size. I'll take another picture of her in the morning so you can see the difference.
God Bless
PS if you haven't been by Kristy's (linked 2 posts ago) please go and rejoice with us! What a blessing!
One of my favorite bloggers Traci wrote a comment and I want to share it, because it's brought up a lot of various thoughts for me and emotions that I want to share:
"I'm always thankful for my healthy girls. I'm sorry I haven't been around much. I've been facebooking and frankly, journals have taken their toll on me emotionally. No offense but your's especially. Babies aren't supposed to be born with problems and little people aren't supposed to die and daddy's aren't supposed to be in the desert without their families. I love you, Christy and am praying for you and your family.
Thursday, March 26, 2009"
If you read Traci you know what a sweet woman she is. She loves Jesus, loves her husband, and loves her girls whom she's homeschooling. She's a Northern girl, living in the South.
Initially I read it and just approved it and went about things, but for some reason I was called back to it and reread it. On that 2nd read I was hurt. Hurt that my blog was too much for others. I don't try to make my blog one that's emotionally draining. I try to mix it up, but sometimes sad is what I'm feeling and I'm not going to hide behind a fake mask. Then I read it again and you know sometimes reality is just too much. It gets to be too much for me honestly, but I unfortunately don't get to avoid it. Now before I go on, please know that this is absolutely no way meant to be read at anything towards Traci, but towards myself! Funny how others thoughts show you your own so clearly. I KNOW what Traci was saying and get it and I will tell you I have to avoid some blogs myself because it's just too much for me at various times. With that though here goes!
I don't get to avoid babies getting sick and dying. My daughter died. She had cancer, she had chemo, total body irradiation (TBI), she had a bone marrow transplant, she replaced, had more radiation, and then the leukemia over took her and Jesus carried her home. I walked on the otherside of the road as one of my very best friends had to hand her baby over, at only 5 days old to Jesus. She did this as I was finishing out a pregnancy I'd prayed more for than I'd prayed for any of my pregnancy's. I walked it with her as I nursed my baby, begging the Lord to keep her quiet so Emily would not hear her, as I listened as she wept over the death of Miller Grace. I don't get to avoid a husband who's a Daddy off in the desert fighting for our country, even if the majority of our country does not support his fight and feels it's worthless. My husband is one of the 4% of American's (yes it's only 4%) who's brave enough to be in the military to fight for our country.
I know that although I have my trials, they are not everyone's trials. Reality is they're not the majorities trials. Yet we all have our own individual trials. For the most part, I've come to terms with Jordyn being in Heaven. I NEVER have to worry about her or her safety or where she's at. I know, I KNOW she's safe in the arms of Jesus! I chose to marry a Soldier. Chad was in the Army when we got maried, but we were not at war. I honestly never dreamt that we'd be seperated so much in our marriage, yet we've spent nearly half of our 12 yrs of marriage apart. It's not always easy, yet we're so blessed. While so many are losing jobs, Chad has job security. We don't have to worry when the next paycheck is coming in, because on the 1st and the 15th we're paid right on time. I don't have to worry about taking my children to the medical clinic or putting food on the table, because we have free medical care. I don't have to worry about where I'm going to live or how rent or a mortage is going to be paid, because the military has housing for us (or if we lived off post would give us a certain amount to pay for our rent). So yes, Chad has a DANGEROUS job, the seperation absolutely sucks, and I wish he was home with us vs in Iraq...but it's his career and it's where God has placed him and he's blessed us through the Army. We have a security that many do not have. I'm truly thankful for that.
I also know though that sometimes reality of my life or others who I care about is just too much for me and I have to find ways to seperate myself. There are blogs I can't go to. Honestly I struggle reading about most children with cancer, although I do read a couple. Let me tell you though, there are times I get out and out jealous to read of a child who beats cancer. I'm NOT proud of this, but it's my truth. I'm thrilled they survived, but jealous none the less, because reality is...I wanted Jordyn to survive and beat cancer in the opposite way that she did beat it. I would LOVE to have an almost 11 yr old here. I'd love for Jacob to not be living in the roll as "Oldest" and would love for him to have the role of "2nd" child, but that's not what GOD allowed for our family. There are times I wish I only had to deal with my husband going away for an overnight trip or even a few weeks trip, or a fishing weekend (oh he'd love that! LOL). But that's not our life! He is that Daddy who's in the desert and my children are the ones who have to live every other year of their life with Daddy being gone and not knowing if he will return to us.
So here it is....sometimes we have to do what we can to survive. Sometimes it's avoiding blogs, sometimes it's avoiding people in our real life, sometimes it's not answering the phone, returning a letter, turning the channel or turning the stupid tv completely off. Sometimes it's not listening to that song that pierces your heart. Sometimes we have to do what we have to, to keep going. Sometimes we have to say no, or suffer burnout.
It's not weakness. It's survival.
All I ask is that you seek GOD. Seek him, love him, praise him and remember that yes there are storms brewing all over the place, but we're still supposed to praise him through those storms. Although it may seem like there are storms at every turn, on every blog...there are also Miracles all over the place.
In a matter of days or weeks my sweet, sweet Emily will be giving birth to her 4th daughter. Abigail will soon be filling their HOME with newborn cries and squeeks, and piggy nursing sounds that Emily has ached to hear for nearly 2 yrs. That my friends is a miracle!
I talk every single day almost to my friend Heather, who a little over a year ago many of you were praying with me for. She'd went into a coma, died, was brought back, and then tetered for weeks, lost part of her lung, lost muscle mass in her body (laying in a coma does that to a person), nearly lost her voice because she had to have a Trach, yet because of the Miracle GOD gave her, gave us, she's alive. She's sassier, speaks her mind more often, loves harder, laughs longer....because GOD gave her a miracle.
I promise you....there are miracles all around you, you just aren't seeing them. So if you're feeling emotionally drained, burt out, or just spent from certain things...take a break from them and start seeking Christ. Ask him to show you his miracles. They're every where and they're AMAZING.
He's HOLY. He's a God of Wonders. He works for all things to Glorify him. Let your life be part of that! Let your spirit! Pray for the sick, pray for those who are seperated from their families, pray for the broken hearted....but do not forget to sing PRAISES!
Traci, thank you for being honest. Thank you for sharing your heart. I love you, too!
So although babies aren't supposed to be sick and daddies aren't supposed to be away from their families, sometimes they are....but my friends GOD is always GOD and nothing happens without his knowledge and ok first and we know that all things happen to Glorify the Lord, so we can rejoice! Sing Praise! God is always faithful to us, he's forever and never will he forsake us. Oh how blessed are we? So blessed, so blessed.
I was given the Kreativ Blogger Award by Amy!
Here are the award rules:
List 7 things that you love, and then pass the award on to 7 bloggers that you love! Be sure to tag them and let them know that they have won. You can copy the picture of the award and paste it on your sideboard letting the whole world know...you are Kreativ!
So... 7 things I love!
1. My Lord and Savior. There is nothing, absolutely and no one who's more important in my life than our Lord
2. Chad, my husband of 12 yrs today! I can not imagine my life without him. He's the leader of our family, the most wonderful man I know, he made me complete, he's given me 4 beautiful children so far, and is a brave US Soldier! What more could a girl ask for?? Oh and he loves me like no one else!!! :)
Jordyn
Jacob, Emma, Jack
3. My children....God has blessed me so much with my children. I can't imagine my life without them. They have showed me how much more important this life is, beyond myself. I have felt the deepest of grief and the highest of joys through my children. Each of them have changed my life in the most profound ways.
4. America. How blessed are we to be Americans? I'm so thankful to be an American
5. PWOC Since we moved to Germany July 2005 and I walked into our chapel and into my first PWOC meeting, I have been so blessed ever since. God has blessed me over and over and over again, I wish I could even explain in words how God's blessed me with this amazing group.
6. Music...primarily Christian music. I love listening and singing. I don't have a single memory where music's not involved some how, from the time I was in the backseat of my parents car of 3 or 4 singing, being on my Aunts front porch singing at the top of my lungs the song "Nobody" by Silvia (country! LOL), being in high school in our select choir, at church...music is always there.
7. Brownies! LOL Seriously I love brownies! hehe! ;)
Ok so I'm going to tag:
1. Lori
2. Kelly
3.Emily
4. Amanda
5. Janis
6.Mimi
7. Emily in Alabama
So ladies take the Award from above and join in!
Do any of you know Kristy? If the answer is no, please go and visit her, read her blog and start praying. Kristy is the proud momma of 4 little boys, 2 are here with them and 2 are in Heaven.
She's now pregnant with their first GIRL and things are not looking as perfect as we've been praying.
I know many of you pray for Stellan, I am too, but if so many can pray for one little guy, why can't we pray for a little girl just as hard? Please start praying and asking others to pray. We know GOD performs miracles still, I've seen it with my friend Heather last year. Many of us witnessed it with Baby Stellan was born healthy. Miracles can and do happen, so please lets pray for another miracle for this little baby girl.
It's funny how one minute life's easy going, feels like it couldn't get any better and then the next thing you know you're being told that your not quite 1 yr old has leukemia. You're told to start praying for one type of leukemia (ALL) because the other one (AML) has a much lower survival rate.
Ten years ago right now, our lives were being turned upside down and inside out. We were being told our sweet Jordyn was not only sick, she was dying possibly. Plans were being made to fly us out of Ramstein (she was dx at Landstuhl) to Andrew's AF base and then onto Walter Reed. By morning plans had changed, Jordyn was far too sick to fly immediately. Instead we went via ambulance (with Chad following behind) to Homburg University and she began treatment there. We were also told that Jordyn had AML Acute Myloid Leukemia, that she had CNS involvement (leukemic cells in her central nervous system), and her only chance would be a bone marrow transplant. She also had pneumonia and was so very, very sick. I can still see Chad's commander come into her room and just break down crying. She was lying there with a mask over her little tiny face to get oxygen and medicine for the pneumonia. Two nights before we'd been roller skating.
Life has never been the same.
Yesterday the kids and I went to one of our local castles. It's about 5 minutes down the road.
Posts
All Comments
