Passive Aggressive People @@

Don't you just love passive aggressive people who in real life can barely share her true feelings about anything, but online she never drops anything. I don't understand people who are one way in real life and the exact opposite online. It's sad actually, that they have such low self-esteem, etc that they can't say how they feel on subjects they claim to be so passionate about, online.

I really don't understand some people. I am not out there screaming my thoughts and views at everyone, yet I'm not one to just shy away from sharing my opinions and views. I know we're all different, yet this kind of behavior really just puzzles me. You just can't have any self confindence it seems to me when you're like this.

If this has taught me anything it's that I can be thankful that I don't fear if people are going to like me or not because of my views. They will like me because they do or not like me. I don't expect everyone to like me and I don't expect everyone to have the same views as me.

I Say It's Hot Here

You may not be able to see that above there...but it calls for today's high as 91 add on humidity, then rain, relief, oh wait...more humidity is back in the air! Tomorrow our high is 86, but because there's rain in the forecast no doubt more humity. Now I'm a Kansas girl, I'm so used to miserable humity, but I'm also a spoiled central air girl and I do NOT like to be sticky, especially come evening time. YUCK. Just yesterday it was saying we were going to be dropping in our temps into the low 80's...but not now. In a few hrs the boys and I will have been here for officially 1 yr. The day we stepped off the plane last July 23 it was in the 50's or 60's...now the day before when we left KCI it hit 100 in Kansas. Let me say right now, although 50 would once again feel like it's freezing...we do have all our winter clothing and well it'd feel good for a couple days anyways! LOL There's no doubt if it's not raining tomorrow, we will be going swimming in the afternoon after church and we'll be going possibly everyday next week. I do not like feeling nasty and sticky. I just feel like once an hour I should jump in the shower, but well that's not exactly logical or possible with the boys. I'm determined we'll have an A/C next year I am telling you this right now, we will not be miserable next year!

Well, I SHOULD get to bed since I'm sitting here yawning, no one to chat with, and it's after midnight! Someone send me some cool weather. (Yes I know it's miserable in the states, I bet most of you have A/C too and at the least you can walk into about any store and have it! Very few even large stores seem to believe in A/C in their stores! I don't get these people! )

Swimming

Today the boys and I had a great day! We went to the pool with a friend of ours and her 3 kids! I didn't think about grabbing my camera for some odd reason, it's really unlike me I take it almost everywhere I go!! They have a swimbad (pool) just off post and it's great! I could kick myself for us not going before this, it's insanely close and it's HUGE! There were A LOT of people there, but it didn't feel crowded at all. They have this HUGE slide, but amazingly it doesn't go into DEEP water, it's just about 4 feet deep is my GUESS. (Jacob could stand in it on his tip toes). First I took Jacob up the slide with Julia (friend) watched Jack in the baby pool) we went down the slide twice! Then Julia went down it with her oldest daughter, while her youngest initially was being held by her son, but and Linda I know you'll be shocked by this one...Hannah wanted ME! So I held her and she almost fell asleep in my arms and was actually content! Julia came back after going down the slide and her and Faith playing in the deeper water for a few and then we decided for all of us to go down the slide! The kids had a blast! Jack LOVED it. I held him and we just flew down that slide, the faster we went the more Jack loved it! LOL Jacob went down by himself and had a ball! We went down the slide probably 4 more times (me and Jack) and Jacob I can't even count how many more times he went. Then we went to the wave pool, and got to enjoy the waves, then we went back to the baby pool for a while. The kids played in the sand too. No day is complete without playing in the sand for my boys! It all washes off and they're happy and carefree, which is how kids should be...not being afraid to get dirty, wet, etc...just enjoying life!

We got home and I made dinner, Jacob crashed out on the couch and Jack was laying back on their little spiderman couch eating an apple and watching tv for a few minutes. Jacob woke up for dinner, he was so tired he just got up and went to the playroom and sat on the floor and cried. I'm really not sure why he went in there, but I told him he needed to eat because Jack was eating from his plate as well as his own. Jacob was still upset (over tired I am sure) but he finally came and ate dinner. They got ready for bed and I read them a story and they both went straight to bed with 100% no arguments. They were both out in less than 5 minutes! I've decided that at least 3 times a week the boys and I are going to the pool. Julia and I are also going to start walking the track earlier in the morning (8 am...ugh I'm NOT a morning person at all) and then we're going to walk over to the pool (it opens at 8:30 AM! Crazy!!) we're going to take turns swimming a few laps, then just playing in the water for a while, then we can walk home. We'll prob. do the pool after the walk once a week, since the other day that we walk we have German language class, so we can get in an hour of walking then the class.

I'm thinking probably Sunday after chapel and nap time I'm going to take the boys to the pool for a few hours. I'm going to just buy the family pass, since I think with in 2 maybe 3 weeks it'll be paid for. Next year I'll buy it as soon as the pool opens and there's a good chance we'll just go swimming every day. I told Jacob that the only way we can go to the pool is if he gets his school work done. So on the days we go he'll have to just ignore Jack and work. I have preschool things I've been working with Jackson on, so I should be able to help keep him quieter than he'd be if he were just playing.

I really wish it'd cool off right now. Actually I'm wishing I'd have bought an A/C that a lady I knew was selling a couple months ago for less than $200.00...oh what a fool am I!!!!! It got to 100 degree's today and it only feels like it's in the low 90's right now, of course I'm in a 3rd floor apartment and there's absolutely NO WIND, so it could be cooler outside, but it's just plain uncomfortable in here. Next summer I'm just sucking it up and buying an A/C if I don't find a used one before that. If we have one next year I can close all the doors and keep the living room area cool and then at night bring it into the hall between the bedrooms and close the door so the bedrooms are nice and cool at night. I'm still not sure what German's, well European's in general have against A/C!! I just don't enjoy sweating, call me crazy! LOL

Have a great weekend!

So much that my head's spinning

Well in the last week our lives have been really crazy. First the death's of the 4 soldiers from our battalion, last Wed was the 1st memorial service for the 1st, 3 soldiers who were killed then yesterday was the memorial service for the 4th soldier who died at the hospital on Thursday from the same accident. My family also had a tragic loss, my step cousin, Jake was killed early Friday morning in a horrible car accident. My head is still spinning from all of these unexpected deaths.

A couple yrs ago I HAD a friend who's husband works for a discount store and told me that her husband faced as much danger as Chad did (who'd left only days before for Iraq the first time), because her husband possibly faced armed robbers. Yes...it's obviously the same. Her husband's the manager of a store and my husband was going to a war zone. That was pretty well the straw that broke the camel's back in our friendship that I found had been littered with lies.

I am proud of the job Chad does. I believe in the job he does. I most definately support the job he does. I don't think the military in general is perfect, no job/career is. There are definately negatives to being an Army wife, but there are also a great deal of positives. I've seen how wonderful our medical care is, when our daughter was dx with leukemia and we never had worries about how we were going to pay our medical bills. We did not have the worries of Chad going to work or coming to the hospital because of pay, he got paid no matter if he was in formation that day or reporting with us to the Peds Hem/Onc clinic on the 5th floor of Walter Reed. I have some definate views in politics, I'm a very CONSERVATIVE REPUBLICAN. I'm a CHRISTIAN. I'm a SOLDIERS WIFE. For me these go hand in hand. How I am as a wife, an American, and most of all a Child of God.

I read a blog very reg. and enjoy this woman's posts so much! Her name is Louie and urge you all to read her! I've been reading her since she was at AOL journals and followed her over to blogger. This is a great post!!!

http://haloscan.com/tb/louie0768/115323047468254077

And Another

Well the 4th soldier who was injured in the attack that killed our 3 soldiers last Saturday died last night. He was surrounded by his family. I didn't know him, but I pray he knew Jesus and pray he's at peace. Pray for this soldiers family.

We don't know when the memorial service for him will be, but I'm guessing early next week. I did get to chat with Chad tonight online and then he called. He was exhausted and I could hear it in his voice. He was up at 3:30 am and he didn't get back to camp after a mission until 9 pm, so it's been a very long day for him. We hung up right before 11 pm his time and he was heading to bed to get some sleep before he had to be up at 5 am.

I think a lot of people get that our soldiers, etc are in danger. What I don't think many realize is how often they go without adequate sleep. This deployment Chad's gotten quite a bit of sleep compared to last one. It was not uncommon for him to go without sleep for a couple days last time and it was not uncommon for him to get just a couple hours of sleep after being up for a couple days to only go back out on another mission and be without sleep for no less than 24 hrs sometimes longer. Although that's not happening with Chad personally this time, there are plenty of guys in his battalion and many others who this is happening to. Please pray that when they do get sleep it's good, deep, truly restful sleep. I am going to make sure when Chad firsts gets home that he gets back into a good sleeping habit with no less than 8 hrs every night. When he gets home, they'll have to return to work (going to briefings, turning things in, etc) for the first 7-10 days, then they're allowed to take leave up to 30 days. I have no doubt Chad will take all 30. He has a lot more than just 30 days of leave earned up, so he plans to take more here and there. Those 30 days sound great to others...but they're not always easy. After being apart for such an extended amount of time, to then being together 24/7 for a straight month....not always the best thing. I'm thinking about after Chad's been on leave for a couple weeks (which means he'll have been home for about 30 days)...taking a day out for me...so he's with the boys and they can do something special. I just want to keep things good for all of us and I know that if we're constantly together, it's not good. Chad and I are both home bodies in general, although we do love to travel. At the same time we need a little space. He's of course more than welcomed to take a day off himself and just go and do what he'd like. I'm going to check into if he can get a fishing license over here or not. When we were stationed here last time it was hundreds of dollars, so I have to find out. This is something he really, really loves to do and although he wouldn't be able to do it when he got home, to give him the gift that he could come spring time would be awesome!!!
Well I'm exhauted...so I'm off to bed.

God Bless

What's going on here

***MY very handsome hubby the night/morning he left for Iraq*** I am going to tell him to take a recent picture, he's lost over 30 lbs since I saw him in April! I saw him on webcam and he looks GREAT!!!!



I wrote an update and even got a response to it from a friend, but it's not showing up for me. Not sure what's going on. It's acted up before so I guess that's what it's doing. Just annoying. I'm going to try and figure out how to get music on here.

I'm so thankful the memorial service is over. I don't recall if I wrote about this in my last entry, if I did I apologize. This was my 4th one in 2 yrs and I will just say this....if I never have to go to another one, it'll be too soon. They're exhausting, draining, and just really takes a toll on your heart and mind. As much peace as I have over this deployment and I truly know God is taking care of Chad, I know that God's plan may not be my plan. As much as I want God to bring Chad home to me safely, that just may not be what he decides to do.

This was on the pack of the program from the memorial service from a wife's perspective:

"Lord, give me the greatness to see the difference in duty and his love for me.
Give me the understanding to know that when duty calls, he must go
Give me a task to do each day to fill the time when he's away
And Lord, when duty is in the field
Please protect him and be his shield. "

That is truly MY prayer and one I will be repeating every day.

A little good a little bad

I'll start with the good: My Jack has potty trained! I decided yesterday that we were going to do this, I knew he was ready and it was just a matter of us not going anywhere and being committed to encouraging him if he needed it, celebrating with him, and leaving him to his own thing! I asked him twice first thing in the morning if he had to go....and he had accidents then I stopped asking and he started going on his own! He was soooo excited pretty well every time yesterday and the kid can pee I'll just say that! LOL At least twice an hour he was going and he did the other duty a few times as well! He wore a diaper to bed, much to his dismay and arguments that "No, no diaper...I'm a big boy now"....but I know that night time is not about control, but about chemicals in his brain actually working and waking him up. My 5 yr old was about 3 or a little over before he started waking up at night to take care of business. So we've done a lot of the potty dance yesterday and today so far has been a success.



Now to the bad......our battalion lost 3 soldiers this weekend and another is seriously injured and on life support at Landstuhl. The memorial service was already this morning over in Iraq and it's this afternoon for all of us in Germany. I didn't know any of the soldiers. Please keep these families in your prayers. One soldier was married with children, another was married to a German national, they hadn't had children. The 3rd soldier was a single soldier, of course his parents are left to grieve.

Chad's hanging in. We chatted this morning already and said he was just glad it was over, they're hard to go through and for him it just brings back memories of close friends lost from our last unit in Kansas. This deployment in about every way has been gentler as far as things happening. For Chad though, he has memories that unless you've been over there and experienced true combat experience, we can't even relate. Many of the soldiers he's with, this is their first deployment to Iraq. One thing we were told the other night at our FRG meeting is that they have councelor's, chaplain, etc over there for the soldiers to talk to. If they were directly impacted (witness) to accidents it's mandatory, for those who didn't it's there for them, but they're not forced. I have my feelings on what should be done and what is done, but we'll wait and see until they're home and how they handle things.