Confused

This morning I discovered that someone who I love, who I valued as a friend, who I thought was taking a break from facebook, instead had deleted me and blocked me. To say my feelings are hurt is putting it lightly. Confused, sad, hurt. I just honestly don't understand it. I DO NOT GET IT!
I have deleted people, heck I've even blocked a couple...although they were never people I considered friends and if I was, I was honest enough to tell them why through a PM, because at some point they were someone I cared enough about to call friend. I do not call people friends, unless I mean it.
What are others take on that? Ultimately when the email you have no longer works, you lost their phone number, because you lost all your contacts at one point. I just would like to know why.
It's obvious that she meant more to me, than I meant to her. I can accept that, I have friendships where I think I may mean more to the person than they mean to me. It doesn't make the friendship less though. It also means that if they did something I would let them know through a private message or something. Heck just call me out in public, at least then I know what in the world is going on.
I know I have a beautiful family and precious friends who are TRUE, REAL, and most importantly, HONEST friends. I thought this person was one of those friends. It sucks when you discover you were wrong about a person. VERY wrong.

So excited

I keep watching the clock today, and of course as with any watched clock, it's dragging by so slowly. Why am I watching it? Tonight when Chad gets home for work, we're going to see my best friend for a few days and then to see Chad's family! (If you're concerned that I'm posting about us leaving our house, no worries we have someone who will be watching our house and neighbors who are watching out for our house as well!).
I just can not wait to see Tami and her family, hug her and spend time with her. We always spend a lot of time laughing, talking, cooking, and just enjoying each others company!! Her kids are out of school Mon-Wed and her husband is taking Thursday and Friday off and she's keeping her boys home the other two days as well, so it'll be a fun week for all. Chad's not seen his family in over 10 years, so I'm so excited that he's going to get to see them!!!
Neither Chad's family nor Tami and her family have met Noah and Olivia, and Emma was only a year old the last time we saw all of them, so I'm really excited about that as well!

God has blessed us so much. My parents very happily agreed to keep Lucky and Alley for us and another friend agreed to keep Whiskers, so the pets are taken care of. When we come home, we'll be staying the night at my parents and then finishing off our trip, thankfully  my parents aren't too far so that when we do have to get back in the van, the drive won't be too bad, just a couple hours!

Today has been a day of doing laundry, backing suitcases, and just cleaning up around the house (steam cleaning the family room, vacuuming the living room and hall) and just making sure everything is picked up before heading out.) Just a few more hours!!!!!

Doner Kebab

Our favorite "fast food" while in Germany was a Turkish-German treat, the Doner Kebab.
There is nothing in America that truly is like it, you can find things that are similar, like a Greek Gyro, but I've yet to find anything just like it.
A friend of mine that was stationed in Germany with me, shared this recipe and I am planning on trying it. We're getting a pretty good tax return, so we'll be purchasing some lamb meet (which is fairly pricey) so that we can attempt to make our own! When we do, I'll report back and let you know how they turned out. In the meantime if any of you want to try making them, let me know if you do and how they turned out!!

For all my Friends who miss food from Germany. Here's the recipe!!!

Doner Kebab's
  Serves: 4 Ingredients: 1 1/2 pounds lean veal Salt Freshly ground pepper 1/2 teaspoon ground cumin (or a prepared doner-kebab seasoning) 2 small onions 5 tablespoons olive oil 4 cloves garlic 3/4 cup sheep-milk yogurt 1 tablespoon fresh chopped parsley 4 flatbreads (the size of your hand) Garnishes: 2 tomatoes 1 cup red cabbage 1 cup cucumber (grated) 1 onion Other: 4 grill skewers Preparation: Preheat the oven to 430 degrees (grill setting). Cut the veal into thin slices and season with salt, pepper, and cumin. Place the seasoned meat on the four skewers Peel the onions and grate finely. Stir half of the resulting onion paste with the olive oil and brush onto the skewered meat, coating all sides. Place the skewers on a grid on the middle rack of the preheated oven. Grill for about 20 minutes, turning several times. In the meantime, peel and press the garlic into the yogurt, using a garlic press. Stir in the parsley, and season with salt and pepper. Set sauce aside. Slice the flatbreads in half, but not all the way through, to form pockets. Drizzle a little olive oil into the pockets. Wash and dice the tomatoes. Wash the red cabbage and cut into thin strips. Wash the cucumber and grate finely. Peel and halve the onion, and cut into very thin strips. Arrange the prepared ingredients on a serving platter. During the meat's last 5 to 8 minutes under the grill, warm the flatbread on the oven floor. Remove the skewers and the flatbread from the oven. Remove the meat from each skewer and place in a bread pocket. Add all of the remaining ingredients or just some, according to taste, and dribble the garlic sauce over the top.

Unexpected goodbyes

Two weeks ago my friend was murdered. This woman loved the Lord and gleaned Him. Her heart was beautiful and everyone that met her immediately felt her love for the Lord and the joy that was in her heart from the Lord. She overcame obstacles that would destroy most, but not only did she survive them, she over came them and she gave GOD all the glory.
I met this amazing woman in Germany, she became a precious friend, a prayer partner, and a confidant. We taught our last bible study together before she moved, we finished up our study and she moved the following week, to Virginia, only days after her husband returned from his deployment to Afghanistan.
Through Facebook, we've kept in touch, continued to pray for each other. Her son disappeared last year and we prayed for his safe return and she's advocated for him and other young adults who get caught up in modern day slavery (those college age kids knocking on  your door to sell magazines, are not in school, they're ultimately being kept from their families. They have no money, no phones, no vehicles, they're being packed into cheap motel rooms, and are being shipped from one city to the next, one state to the next, often not being fed enough to keep the stomach pains away, rarely getting much rest, often being physically abused by their "managers", and being kept away from their friends and family who have no idea where they are." She was working with the FBI and her state Senators on this issue, to bring other young adults home and get them out of this awful thing. Amazing mom, amazing woman.
So how was such an amazing woman murdered? What we know is in December her husband hurt her, was hitting her. We do not know if this has been an ongoing issue, or a recent behavior that started. When I say we, I'm talking about her Army wives sisters. A restraining order and his removal from the home happened. We know that on Saturday he showed up at their home and threatened her and she called the police, who had been out looking for him. We know that he waited until she left for work Sunday night, followed her and pushed her vehicle off the road, then got out of his truck and shot her, called the police, confessed, got into the passenger side of her truck and killed himself.
He left their children as orphans. The oldest two boys were not biologically his, but he'd raised them as his own, the middle two were biologically theirs, and they adopted their niece when she was an infant. Now a 15, 13, and 7 year old are left to grow up without their parents and two very young men of 19 and 20 are left to navigate this world without their parents, and let me just say, most importantly, without their mom. Without their wonderful, beautiful, God-fearing, mother.
I'm so sad for these kids. I'm heartbroken that these babies have to live the rest of their lives knowing what their dad did to their momma. I'm heart broken that they will never get the best hugs ever, from their momma.
Murder/Suicide, I don't think it ever makes sense, no matter who is involved. I have never had this happen to someone I love. What I know is there are truly 3 families destroyed. The family they created together and their own families they came from. Grief is abounding from all walks of life, from their families, military family, and friends throughout the years. My heart is heavy. Satan does not win, my sweet friend won. She's with Jesus now and her children KNOW she's with the Lord. They know that she loved them with all her heart and that she did all she could to protect them. God wins, he always will. I have to remind myself of that. Good will always beat out evil. What I know is that what was intended to be evil, will turn into good. We praise him through this storm, we will pray her children through this. We will live better, because of the beautiful example my friend taught me, who emulated our Lord.
I continue to cry out to Jesus, lift my prayers, my heart, up to Him.
This may have been an unexpected goodbye, but oh I can only imagine what a beautiful reunion my precious friend is having with the Lord right now, for that I am thankful.

Dianne

When we were in Germany, I found that some of my dearest friends were chaplain wives. My precious friend, Heather went through some VERY scary health issue's and through it our friendship grew stronger and we became closer than ever. They are not wrapped in a super natural bubble wrap to protect them from bad things, if that were the case, Heather wouldn't have almost died, well actually she DID die, but through the Grace of GOD and his hands working with physicians, she's still here.
One of the chaplain wives I got to know and grew to love is, Dianne. I think everyone who was stationed in Bamberg while she was there could all say many things about Dianne. She had a definite presence. She had the most beautiful, strong, powerful singing voice I have ever heard in my life. Honestly, I could just listen to her sing the phone book (you know when they existed!!). Just thinking about her singing, gives me chills and brings me to tears, because that beautiful singing voice no longer sings. Dianne walked every day. When I think of speed walking, I think of Dianne. There was not a day that you did not see her out walking, often times pushing her stroller with her youngest in it, often that's where he took his afternoon nap, so he got good fresh air and she got her much needed and desired walk in (she walked more than once a day, but almost always in the early afternoon). She took care of herself, ate healthy, no smoking, etc. A couple years ago, Dianne was diagnosed with lung cancer and there was cancer in other area's of her body as well. She was not given a lot of hope from her doctors as far as long term survival, yet she's fought with passion, grace, and determination. During her own fight, her mother had her own battle with cancer as well, and through this she's an Army wife, mother of 6 with 4 still at home.
Right now, Dianne's in the hospital with pneumonia. More cancer tumors have showed up. She's hoping to go home in the next few days and because now there's nothing more to do, she's seeking clinic trials, because she wants to live. She trusts our Lord and knows and finds comfort that when it's her time, he'll call her home, in the mean time though, she wants to live, she wants to continue to watch her children grow, she wants to continue to grow old with her husband.
Will you please join me in prayers for Dianne and her family, her husband and her 6 children, along with her extended family. The ache in my heart is so overwhelming that after I read the latest update on Dianne Saturday night, I've just been in tears daily and prayers. I KNOW that when the Lord calls her home, there will be peace in Dianne's soul. I also know that her husband and children will grieve so deeply and that she's a woman that simply can not ever be replaced. Join me in prayers that the Lord will give a miracle, that he'll allow her to have not just days or months, but years still. Her youngest is still just so young (under the age of 8), so the thought of him growing up without his momma just takes me to knee's in tears. To think of her girls getting ready for their wedding without their momma to help them slip into their dress, sit and pray with them, and give them words of wisdom on being a wife.

I pray for a miracle. I pray that the Lord will cure her of cancer, while on this earth and allow her to see her babies grow up, and allow her to rock her grandbabies and sing them to sleep.

That is my prayer for Dianne, whether it's God's will for her, I do not know, but I'm asking all of you to join me in praying for her and her family.