Saturday, July 24, 2010

Overwhelmed by Love

Sweet Noah James

Noah and Proud Big sister Emma

Hammy Jackson


Emma Grace

All you Momma's out there I think will understand this statement: "Overwhelmed by love" for my little ones. Carrying Noah from my bedroom to the livingroom I felt the emotions all lumped up in my throat and the tears about to burst from my eyes and all I could think of was "Thank you Lord for this little boy. I just love him so very much." I learned when I became a Momma 12 years ago with Jordyn that the love I felt for her was more than anything I'd ever held inside my heart and it often was just bursting outside of me, so beyond my control that I let go of any control I "thought" I had to begin with and let the love burst forth. After she died, I honestly never thought I'd be able to love like that again. I still loved Chad, but as wives and mothers we all know the love we have for our husband's is just as deep (as it should be, if not, even MORE) but it's DIFFERENT (different is a good thing). So there I was full of honest to goodness FEAR that I would not be able to love Jacob throughout my pregnancy. I was seriously stunned when that overwhelming love came bursting out of me for Jacob when I heard his cries and saw his beautiful face for the first time, along with a wave of relief that I indeed was able to love another child that GOD had blessed our family with. The shock wasn't so stunning when Jackson came along, and I was ready for it with Emma, and I was anticipating it with Noah. It just comes, because LOVE comes from Jesus and since these babies are nothing less than a gift from is not an option. Still there are those moments where it's just such a fresh, powerhouse that it overtakes me.


That corgi :) said...

they are all sooo beautiful or handsome, including sweet Jordyn who is always a part of your family. truly blessed indeed, Christy, even in the midst of your suffering and pain, truly blessed indeed


He & Me + 3 said...

Your children are all beautiful and your famiy is so blessed.