Tuesday, November 01, 2011

Wishing Days Away

This morning I wrote a status update about not wishing away days with your children, but you know I can expand on that to anyone in your life (spouse). Days are precious and we're never guarenteed a single one of them, they're a gift from God. When I see person after person posting how they can't wait for this day or that day and it's a constant day after day, month after month issue, it breaks my heart. They don't get it. They justify it. "Well, my husband's deployed so I just want this year to go by fast so he can be home and then I want time to slow down" No, I'm sorry but to "me" that doesn't cut it. I've been through 5 deployments the last being 14 1/2 months long, yes I missed Chad more than I could ever describe in words, but I did my best to enjoy the days I had with my kids, and not wish our days away. We ALL have bad days and look forward to bedtime, but that shouldn't be a day in and day out thing, if so...I think that's when we need to take a good, hard, long look at ourselves and ask ourself why. What's our attitude. Is it one of selfishness or gratitude? Are we looking at the days we have as something we just have to get through or are we really living each day to the maximum? Did you praise God for this day? Have I praised God for this day? No, then lets do it right now. Thank you, Jesus for today. Thank you for my husband and my children: Jordyn who's safe in your arms, for Jacob who's growing up too fast and was recently said to himself and to me that he's looking like a teenager (he's not one yet and it broke my heart a little to step back and look at him and see how old he's getting, it seems like just yesterday I gave birth to him), Jackson who's got an innocence and immaturity about him that many 8 year olds are discouraged to have, yet is such a part of WHO Jack is, and what's wonderful and frustrating all at the same time. Emma who's our beautiful little girl, our princess, who's growing up far too quickly, who's smart and beautiful and loved by everyone who meets her. Noah, my sweet baby boy. He's sweet and loving and just enough ornriness that days with him are full of laughter. This baby who's growing inside of me, I do not know who she or he is yet, but God does. This child is a miracle and blessing and just a simple gift from GOD. Thank you for Chad. For the man he is and the man he's constantly becoming with the help of GOD. Thank you for bringing him home from every deployment he's been sent on to war torn nations, thank you for the father he is to our children, and the husband he is to me. He loves me no matter what size I am, how ugly in attitude I can be, how emotional and all over the place I can be, no matter if I'm irrational and irate or calm and peaceful...he loves me and challenges me to be better, but loves me no matter where I am.

Let me enjoy watching Emma throwing the balloon around and ancing around to Klove, as Noah runs around all crazy and silly and begs to go back into the kitchen because he's always hungry. Let me enjoy our homeschooling days, even when the boys procrastinate and sit there just looking at their pages. Please don't let me take any of these moments for granted.

I want to be gentle in my words and actions. Please Lord remind me everyday, not to take a moment for granted.