Thursday, September 09, 2010

still here

I'm sorry I haven't written lately. I've tried and just haven't been able to publish them for this reason or that. Chad's healing. He's still on leave until the end of the month, he's doing physical therapy now. He's helping with school (we homeschool) and right now he's doing the majority of it with the kids, it's been great for all of them as he see's what it's like for me and the boys are getting this one on one and one on two attention from him in this area.

I'm honestly still digesting with Rebekah being gone. My heart is hurting and my head is still just trying to grasp that she's really gone, it does not seem real. My heart is just so heavy over her death. I know she's happy and healthy and in Heaven now. I just miss her so much. I told her everything...the heaviness on my heart to the light, silliness of how many loads of laundry I got done that particular day. Oh I miss her so much. I chatted with her every night, and now nothing. I just miss her. My heart hurts. I long to see her pop online and start chatting. Her phone is still signed on to aol and it takes everything in my being not to write to her. Convincing myself not to takes nearly all my strength.

Noah's growing. He's a big boy, 3 months old...so happy. He's laughing and smiling all the time. I am sure he's going to be rolling far too soon. Emma's great, she loves Noah, yet longs to be the constant center of attention. Jack is finally getting over his excessive whining (Praise Jesus), and Jacob's attitude is getting much better.

I hope this weekend to give a decent blog post.

God Bless



6 comments:

That corgi :) said...

I think it is neat, Christy,that Chad is working with the kids on the home schooling! great experience indeed for all of them and I bet he is giving them a different perspective about things too! I'm also glad he is healing up and will have a few more weeks to do so. I am so sorry that you lost your dear friend, Rebekah. I think it is hard sometimes these days to find a "true" friend and often when we do, we move, or they move, or unfortunately they pass away etc and our hearts do ache. I know you will never find any friend that could take her place in your heart, but I pray you will find at least someone that half takes her place to help fill up some of that loneliness with her passing. She will always remain a very important person to you and I know you will always miss her.

Glad to hear all the wee ones are doing good! enjoy your days of mothering; blogs can wait :)

betty

Amanda said...

I cant even fathom your loss... I'm just so sorry sweety! She sounds like the most amazing woman.

Will continue praying for you and the family... sounds like the 'healing break' has been fruitful...

Blessings!
Amanda

Bri said...

Praising God for the Chad's healing and the extra help with homeschooling. I'm sorry your heart is hurting. I will keep praying for you and all those who loved Rebekah.

Cheryl said...

I was at church this morning and when I listened to the following song, it made me think/pray for you. http://www.hymnsite.com/lyrics/umh534.sht

The verse though that really brought you to mind this morning was the following...which isn't included in the verses at the website above.

Be still, my soul, though dearest friends depart
And all is darkened in the vale of tears;
Then shalt thou better know His love, His heart,
Who comes to soothe thy sorrows and thy fears.
Be still, my soul; thy Jesus can repay
From His own fulness all He takes away.

I am so sorry for your loss of your dearest friend. I do know loss because my son died at the age of 17 months old on August 20th of 2008, but I don't know your loss. No words can express how sorry I feel for you.

((hugs))
With love and Hope,
Cheryl

Cheryl said...

http://www.nancyguthrie.com/still-holding-on/

check out the heading "Be still my soul"...so "God" that I would keep coming across the same message...for you (and me)!

((hugs))

Emily said...

Love you, friend.