Thankful

I like so many of you have been glued to the news tonight (vs the Olympics) watching for the Tsunomi was heading towards Hawaii and watching as the numbers went up for the victims of the devestating earthquake in Chile (wow an 8.8). My heart has been in my throat tonight though waiting for the water to come in on Hilo as I have so many friends who live there. My best friend in high school lives there, friends from the Army are stationed there, but thankfully via Facebook I got PM's and status updates saying they were safe and on high ground. Can I tell you what a blessing social networking is? To think that just a couple years ago most of us would have had to depend on emails, and even a few years before that a phone call. Technology is not always a good thing, but tonight it's been such a blessing to me personally as I waited on news and felt such concern for people I cared about and love to know if they're ok or not, safe or not and to have those answers so quickly...what a cool blessing GOD's allowed. The biggest blessing though is that the Tsunomi ended up being very minor for the state of Hawaii.
I have been and continue to pray for those in Chile.

Last night at the Hospitality House we read from Revelations Chapters 2 and 3 and how in so many ways that we do and don't recognize we're living quite possibly in the end of times (well the beginning of the end), we spoke of all the natural disasters that GOD allows and how it at least seems to us they seem to becoming more and more often.

One of the things that was said last night from a friend there was how she's not afraid of dying for Christ, it's living for him that's hard. To live and praise him through the hard times, to witness such devestation, heartache, and heartbreak and still see all his goodness shining through. THAT IS HARD, but we're called to do it none the less. Being a Christian is NOT easy, at least not in my experience. I think if it was easy, for me what would be the point? The things that challenge us, makes us take a deep look, etc those are often the things that we look back on and say "it was worth it". I look at my walk with Christ as being a mom. It's not easy, often there are days I want to throw in the towel and run away, far, far away. To not have the responsibility of mothering. To not have the heartaches that's come with being a mom. Yet it's worth it, even when things don't work out like you planned. Even when you think "this is not the life I imagined". Let me say I'm the first to say that. My life is NOT the life I imagined. I never imagined the heartache I'd experience, the deep pain that still haunts me nearly 10 years later. I never believed I'd know the pain of having my daughter die and know the heartache of seeing her in that tiny casket. I also never knew the joy I'd feel. The love that would form over 9 months and onto the rest of my life. No matter the pain, it's worth it. Even if I knew how it'd all end, including if I'd known Jordyn would go to Heaven at only 2 years old....I'd do it again. Walking with Christ has been hard at times and yet it's brought me the absolute greatest joy of my life and it's worth every hard part, because no matter how hard, horrible, terrifying life here on earth may be....Heaven's the reward for loving, knowning, and devoting my life to Jesus. To know that one day I'll spend eternity with my Savior, wow!

Tonight I'm so thankful. Thankful that GOD's faithfun in all ways and over all things, even when I don't understand the how's and why's of things of this world or just of my own life. The simple truth is, I don't have to know the why's or how's, I just have to accept that the LORD has allowed them and trust him.