Day 17: Your Favorite Memory

My favorite memory...easy: Jordyn's whole 2 years of life. From the first time I held her I was passionately in love with that little girl. I had never felt anything so powerful or fast. Even during my pregnancy with her I was intensley in love with her. When we moved to Germany, even night I would take her to her room and sit in the rocking chair and rock her until she fell asleep. She would play with my hair, and the warmth of her breath on my neck as I sang to her. I'd often sit there and just hold her for an hour or more after she fell asleep, listening and feeling her breath, the softness of her hair against my cheeks. When she'd been diagnosed with leukemia, cuddling with her and literally clinging to her and praying to our Lord to let her live. Getting to Walter Reed and her running up and down the hall ways, giggling and being full of joy. Being home with her and all her girliness of playing with her babies and kitchen and of course her Barbie Jeep. She did NOT like sand or dirt. There's not a memory with her that I don't cherish.

Day 16: Your First Kiss

Day 16: Your First Kiss

Ok I'm so horrified by this one and have seriously been dreading this one. It was the summer between 1st and 2nd grade. Yes I'm serious. My family went on vacation that year to Wyoming. We spent the first part of the week with my dad's oldest sister (he's #5 out of 12 and she's the oldest of all of them). We spent an insane few days with her and her family seeing all that was in that area we went to see the Mount Rushmore, Devil's Tower, and so much more that my brain can't remember because one...it was so many years ago and 2 I was very young! Well the 2nd half of the week we went farther north to see family friends. While visiting them (they were old enough to be my grandparents) many of her children and grandchildren lived nearby so we spent a great deal of time with them. I think it was the first night there, and all of us kids went to the park. Rowdy was the little boys name, we were the same age I believe and if not he was only 1 year older. While we were there he kissed me. Not some little innocent peck either, but a big, open mouth, wet kiss. I remember not knowing if I actually liked it or not, but decided I was going to like it and let him kiss me all he wanted over the next few days and there was a lot of kissing. Who does that? What 6/7 yr old girl has business being kissed. I can remember we slept over at his house one night. I know we all slept out in a common room. He waited until his sisters and my brother were asleep and then he started kissing me again. I honestly don't even know where his mother was at that point, but I know eventually she came in and made Rowdy just go to his room and me feeling really happy that I could finally go to sleep. I don't think any of the adults had a clue, because it's definitely something my mother would throw in my face if she knew and she's never said a word about it. (Up until a few years ago she still would bring up my first crush, which to me just seemed rediculous...I was married and it was a school girl CRUSH, nothing more). Anyways....that was my first kiss. A little boy named Rowdy (who from what I was told a few years ago got into a lot of trouble, so I guess the name suited him or inspired him one or the other) was my first kiss, at a park in Wyoming. Thankful that at this point, neither of my boys have done that and I will not allow Emma that opportunity or any of our other children!


I am praying that by us raising our children in the Lord and knowing him they will not follow in my or Chad's foolish footsteps and will honor and value themselves far more than either of us did.

Tears and Judgement

I am not ashamed to cry. I recognize and realize that tears are not a sign of weakness, but are cleansing and refreshing to the soul. They often open you up to more people as they see you're willing to show your emotional side. Last year it seemed every time I turned around someone was making a snide comment about my tears, although when I sat down and thought about it, my tears seemed to come less and less last year and since having Noah I can count on one hand how many times I've cried. I normally go through a dry spell from time to time a few times a year, but this has been I think the longest, where other than a couple times because of circumstances I'm not at a place I'm willing to talk about here, I've just not cried much. I will get teary eyed with Noah, and of course had the normal post partum tears after having Noah, but although there have been things that normally would set the tears off, lately even when I want and need to, I can't cry.

As I was reading my devotional tonight low and behold what is it about....tears. Let me share part of it with you:

Revelations 7:17 "For the Lamb at the center of the throne will be their shepherd;he will lead them to springs of living water. And GOD will wipe away every tear from their eyes".
Look at your bible and the men, yes MEN in it. How many of them wept? David did, my goodness Psalms is full of his tears. Jacob wept and grieved at the death (or so he thought) of his beloved child, Joseph. And most importantly....JESUS WEPT. JESUS wept and cried out to the Lord.

I have held onto this hurt for the last year. I've felt bitterness towards a particular person last year, bitterness that turned a place/group/ministry that I LOVED/LOVE into something that I dreaded and nearly wanted no part of. What I am constantly learning and relearning is that we can tease via friendly teasing, but even that can get hurtful after a while. We have to guard our own hearts and for me I need to be sensitive to not out of sarcasim, teasing, jesting, etc cause pain to others because of something they do or don't do.

I honestly do struggle to understand those who have a hard time openly crying, because it is such a natural thing to me. But that's who they are. I have no right to judge them for it, to see it as a weakness (whether it is or isn't)...instead I just need to love them, be an encouraging friend, a soft place, and love them like Jesus. Let me tell you though...I suck at that. I sit here in my home, in my chair and I judge. I judge like no one's business. Who am I to do that? I, who's constantly concerned that others are judging her, that people are gossiping about her, or simply talking about her behind her back....so who am I to do it? I wish so much that GOD would just swipe those thoughts out of my head, that he'd slap his hand across my mouth, and then get right in my face and tell me to SHUT UP. My silent judgement has allowed me to put a wall up. I've cut myself off from allowing others to get too close. It hurts to have others make you feel like a part of your personality is this big flaw, that's to be made fun of. It hurts when you feel like when you walk into a room others are judging you because you cry easily, because you're the fat girl, or any other reason. It hurts to think people are talking about you behind your back because of any or all of those reasons as well.
I'm tired of worrying about what others think or are saying or not saying. I KNOW I only need to be concerned with what GOD thinks of me. I know I need to worry less about the opinions of others, and just simply be the woman GOD wants me to be. Why is that so difficult though? Why do we continue to listen to Satans lies? Why am I so self centered that I think what someone has said or written is a jab or simply directed to me? You know I've reread the previous sentence 5 times now and here's a simple truth...I'm simply not that important in others lives for them to talk about or write about me 99.9% of the time. It's really conceited of me to think otherwise. Wow, that was quite the revelation from GOD just now. I need to get over myself. Time to pull up my big girl panties and just let these issue's go, because they are most definitely my issue's and not others. Well then.....

Lord let me see myself in your eyes. Let me be the woman you desire for me to be. Let me be the wife and mother you have called for me to be and not be concerned or so self centered as to think that others are talking about me or even thinking enough about me to make it about me. Lord, let me live this life of mine to be all about you and not about me. It's not about me, it's all about you. I have to remind myself of that daily, Lord. Thank you for this clear reminder and good old slap in the face via my own fingers. Thank you, Lord.

Day 15: Your Dreams

Day 15 is Your Dreams

I think this is more about aspirations and hopes and not about what I dream about at night, if so it'd be a short one liner of "I rarely if ever remember!" rather boring!
My dreams have changed over the years some in ways that I never even imagined. When I was a teenager I had my life mapped out as so many of us do. I was going to go to college, get my degree in Child Psychology, meet the man of my dreams, have the practice of my dreams, then have 3 children...a boy, a girl, and another boy, and of course we'd live happily ever after.
Well I found that child psych. was not what I wanted to do. I eventually met and married Chad and well 5 kids later :) . I honestly thought I'd travel and visit Europe but NEVER live here.
My dreams at this moment are: To one day see a CURE for childhood cancer. To see a way for childhood cancer to be prevented. I want to see a day where my husband doesn't have a deployment looming in his life every other year. I dream of continuing to teach my children at home, of them not only continuing their love for Jesus as children, but for them to continue their love and relationship with Christ as adults as well. I dream of having a solid and healthy relationship with my children as adults, and dream of Chad having one with them too.
I dream that Chad will retire from the Army in a few years and that he follows the calling that GOD is calling him to (becoming a Chaplain). I dream that I will be the woman GOD has called me to be, and not the one "I" want to be. (Two very different things some days).
I dream of holding all of my babies again in Heaven, never having fear or concern that another will be diagnosed with cancer, die a painful death, feel unspeakable pains and heartache.
I dream that one day I'll have at least a decent relationship with my parents (mostly my mother and my relationship is strained to say the least).

My greatest dream is to truly have a heart like Jesus. I can't tell you in written word how far it is from such a beautiful place, but it's so far and it grieves me so much. I want to love others like Jesus does. I want to see them as he does. I'm not sure that dream will come true until I get to Heaven, but I truly want it.

So with all these dreams the best thing I can do is give them to Jesus and let him do as he will with them. And pray,pray, pray.


In His Grace,

Day 14: What I wore today (again)

Day 14 is What i wore....again and so soon. Again just a stupid one, but oh well. I've been sick all day. Some lovely stomach bug. Not sure who i caught it from, but it's here so i guess it doesn't matter. I'm just praying the kids and Chad do not get it.
So since I've been ill all day (well since last night actually) you can guess that I've stayed in my pj's all day. Nothing exciting that's for sure, but comfort is the key for the day.

Hey I'm participating in a Military Spouse Blog Hop.....if you're a Mil. Spouse join in and if you're not, although you can't link up, you can still find some great new blogs!!!

oops missed Day 12: What's in your Bag

Day 12: What's in your bag

Ha...I skipped this yesterday and went straight to day 13! Well joyfully I literally just switched bags out. I am only carrying one bag right now, the diaper bag. I have a wonderful friend who makes bags similar to Vera Bradley bags (similar, but not exact) and for a fraction of the cost! They were stationed in Korea after they left here a few years ago and she got all the same material for only a few dollars per yard vs over $10.00 a yard for the same material in the states!! Anyways, she's made me a few bags and made me Noah's diaper bag! I just washed it so I just started putting stuff in it again! Right now there are about 7 diapers, the small wipe case, my wallet, chapstick, and a pen. That's it! :) Nothing exciting and very light! (Now don't go asking me this question in a week, I am sure I'd have a load of junk in that list! LOL).

Day 13: This Week

This week..I'll do my best! :)
Sunday: We went to church, went to the dining hall and had lunch, came home for a few, went to the chapel at 3 to work on AWANA stuff, then had AWANA from 4-5:30. Came home, had dinner, and relaxed.
Monday: The kids and I did school, played, we skipped sports time at the park with our homeschool group so the boys could finish up their school for the day. Jacob had cub scouts. I made stuffed shells for the single soldiers dinner that the Hospitality Host does once a month (and made our family stuffed shells as well). Dropped them off and when Chad got home we ran to the PX bought candy and bads for "Boo Bags" and the kids and I went and boo'd a few of their friends, since they'd been boo'd. We also bought candy to hand out on Halloween.
Tuesday: The boys did school, I had praise team practice, Noah turned 5 months old and sat upright without assistance (not from the laying position, but I sat him on the couch and he stayed sitting without falling over!). Noah had his Well baby check up, he weights 19 lbs 7 oz and is 25 1/2 inches long (yep he's a big boy). Ran a few errands after his apt, then home, made dinner. I feel like we did something that evening, but i can't remember for the life of me!!
Wednesday: I had PWOC, the boys did their school work during PWOC, came home made lunch, did some cleaning....I know I did some errands. Did not have evening PWOC which was nice break.
Thursday: School with the boys, cleaned, ran errands, and other things but I can't remember what. It's rather sad.
Friday: School in the morning, Homeschool PE after lunch, went to the commissary and a couple items I needed for what I was making to take to the Hospitality House. Came home and made dinner, we had a friends son over for a sleep over (he's good friends with Jacob), went to the Hospitalty House for our weekly small groups bible study and dinner.
Saturday: I got to sleep in...big time! :) Whoot-whoot! Got up, got dressed, had lunch, then we headed out and met with friends from the Hospitality House and went to a large Flea Market and found some good deals (a large wicker trunk that I'm going to use for throw blankets), an old world map (seriously awesome, although I plan to reframe it since its current frame is UGLY) and found a lazy susan that's huge and we only paid a few dollars for. After we were done we went to the post that was very close and got groceries (their commissary is only a little bigger than ours, but so much better!!!). Oh and we had dinner at Taco Bell since they have one and we do not. Came home, unloaded groceries and our finds, I nursed Noah and then we loaded back into the van and we headed to the Volks Fest (it's like a carnival).

There you have it. I know there are things I forgot that we did, but so is life! It's not always exciting, but it's ours!!

5 Months Old

Noah's 5 months old!! It's amazing how quickly the last 5 months have gone by. I think that with each baby, but it's true. The time just flies (and it continues to fly no matter the age). Noah's a complete joy though. We've had a few bumps this last month. One night he decided that sleep was TOTALLY over-rated and didn't fall asleep until 6 AM! When Chad got up at 5 and left and sad how guilty he felt about leaving me knowing we hadn't slept, I burst into tears (they were short lived), and was thankful that he finally fell asleep and I was very thankful that my other kids slept in and then let me sleep (sort of) for another hour...yep they got to veg out in front of the tv vs starting on school first thing. I will say though, that's the beauty of home schooling, flexibility. I was not functional and had enough mind to tell them to watch a movie that would work for all 3 and please eat breakfast and be as quiet as possible.
Noah's also teething, or has been working on teething. Eventually those little buds will pop through. I'm in no rush! LOL
I'm still his very favorite person in the world! :) He lights up when he see's me. He leans towards me, lifts his arms, etc. He does really love his Daddy, brothers, and sister. He and Jack seem to click the best. Jackson can put him to sleep like no one else. Emma's so in love with him, it's rediculous, and Jacob has developed a very special bond with him as well. It's a beautiful thing to see your older children in love with their baby sibling. I honestly can't imagine only stopping with 2 or even 3 children, when I look at Noah and think of what a blessing he is to our family and how much I love him. We're so blessed that GOD has called our family to leave our family size in HIS hands!!!

With that...here's a few pictures. They're all from October. On his 5 month birthday he decided it was time that he would be a big boy and sit all alone. (Not sitting up from laying, but I sit him on the couch of floor and he stays sitting up without assistance!) Such a big boy and so exciting to see his newest milestone!

Day 11: What You Wore Today

No picture......but what I wore today, personally I think this is pretty stupid for a getting to really know a person, but anyways! :)

I wore blue jeans, a purple top (short sleeve), my beautiful brown wool sweater that I got in Ireland at a wool shop (they make the wool right there, they had sheep just outside), my brown crocs and no socks (which was stupid since it was sooo stinking cold today), hair up in a pony tail.

Nothing exciting, just a pretty average day for me. I'm a blue jeans kind of girl. Of course at this point I'm already in my soft work out type pants and a tank top to sleep in.
Seriously dumbest one.

Day 10: Your Siblings

(My handsome brother and his beautiful family)

I have a great brother. We're 1 yr and 2 weeks apart. Growing up we did NOT get along. We fought constantly. I can say I honestly did not like him very much when we were kids. The fights were vicious, yet I know we still had a lot of fun together did a lot of stupid things together. As we grew we became friends, slowly. Phil has a great sense of humor, he can make anyone laugh, and let me tell you he LOVES his family. He married his high school sweetheart and they have 2 of the most gorgeous little girls who ever walked this earth! (I'm not biased, it's just a fact!).
As a kid he was not exactly a great student, and I only share that with you because my parents worried he had a learning disability...yeah if you call being brillant a disability...no he was just lazy and didn't care. He managed to graduate high school and college was the last thing he wanted to do at that point and the last place he needed to be, so he joined the Army and served 3 years, matured a bit, got married. After he got out of the Army he worked at a few various places (always full time and always hard, manual labor type work). He decided he'd hate it and that he was going to work hard, and go to college and he has! He's working on his nursing degree right now, works at a hospital in their Cardiac Center (he was actually fought over between the Surgical dept. where he was working and the Cardiac Center...he made a great name for himself). He worked the long 12 hour shifts for a year or so and a few months ago when to the Cardiac Center, with a raise and nice hours of 8-5 with weekends and holidays off, all while working on his degree. He's taking a full time load of are you ready for this....17 hours (he's a little bit crazy!). And that's not it....both of his daughters are very active in sports so he coaches, he goes to every practice and game (his older daughter plays baseball well the season's over now, so she did 30 miles from home, so quite the drive).

I truly love my brother and I'm so proud of the man he's become and all that he'll be in the future. It breaks my heart that we're so far away from him and his family. But thank the Lord for technology!!!

Day 9 {Your Beliefs}

Well if you've read my blog at all this will not come as a surprise....
My beliefs lie solely with Jesus Christ. I believe there is only ONE way to Heaven and that is through accepting that Jesus is the Son of GOD and accepting him as your savior. I believe that if you do not believe in the SON, you will NOT get to Heaven. No amount of GOOD works will get you to Heaven, it's all about the FAITH in the SON. I believe that many people I love and care about will not be joining me in Heaven and that's heart breaking and I'll continue to share The TRUTH (GOD's HOLY WORD) with them, but ultimately it's their choice and I can not be soley responsible for their decision and I am not responsible for their rejection of Christ. I think that those who blame others for not accepting Christ, for pushing them away from church, are only making excuses for not wanting to stop living in their sins, lazineness, and actual take responsibilty for their life now and for eternity.

I have some VERY strong feelings on this and honestly when I read a blog about people thinking works and karm and all that junk will allow them into Heaven, it makes me want to just slap them. I know not nice, but HONEST. I'm NOT perfect. I do still find myself sinning, but I REPENT, and try hard not to do it again (although there are times I do and again I repent). I believe it's very important to attend church as I believe as GOD tells us we're to surround ourselves with believers AND accountability. I don't believe that church must be done in a brick and mortar building though. I have met people who's church is at home and other fellow believers all gather there weekly and have their own church service. I believe that the Man/husband is the head of the household. I believe the wife is to be submissive (even though I still struggle with this, I KNOW it's the way it's supposed to be and I'd be blessed beyond measure if I'd only let go and do what GOD tells me to do).

I believe in the GRACE and forgiveness in Christ and know that without it I'd be lost. I know that I'm a sinner and that I'm forgiven. I am in AWE that he died for me and that he has forgiven me of all my ugly and nasty sins.

I believe my children will be miles (well they already are) ahead of me in their walk with Christ, because they're growing up knowing Him, having a relationship with HIM, and knowing the bible in general...I was not raised in a Christian home, and did not come to Jesus until I was 24 years old. I knew him, but wasn't living for him and hadn't completely given my life over to him.

I'm so thankful for my faith in Jesus Christ. I'm so thankful that all I truly have to do is accept his gift of salvation. That I don't "have" to do any works for him (although once you're living for Christ, good works do come naturally, but not required) to be saved. I am so very thankful that I know the ONE Truth, the ONE TRUE SAVIOR. JESUS CHRIST

Kurbis (Pumpkins)

Day 8 {A Moment}

A moment. The moment I became a mother. The moment that child who made me a mother was diagnosed with leukemia. The moment I watched chemo go into her little precious body. The moment we left Germany and headed to Walter Reed. The moment we were told she relapsed before her bone marrow transplant (bmt). The moment she went back into remission. The moment she recieved her new marrow. The moment she was released and we thought we were moving into the next phase of her life. The moment I was told she had relapsed. The moment we were told there was nothing left to do. The moment she left my arms for Jesus's. These are some of the most defining moments of my life and they all happened to me between the years of 21 to 23 for me. There are so many more moments in my life.

Day 7 {Your Best Friend}

This is one that could go on forever, but I'll try to keep it short. Chad's my best friend. I'm blessed that I can say that about my husband. So many women seem to spend their days complaining about their husbands, bashing them, etc. I know I'm guilty of it myself. I'm guilty of being annoyed with him, venting about him, etc. It's something I've been working on very hard to stop. I'm working on appreciating him as my husband and being a GODLY wife to him.
Now as a woman I've been blessed with female best friends. I will start with Rebekah. She and I met shortly after our family arrived at Ft. Belvoir, well actually we were still living at the Ronald McDonald House waiting on housing, while Jordyn was being treated at Walter Reed. Her husband and Chad were in the same unit, and her and I hit it off immediately. At the time they only had their oldest son, S, he was 6 months younger than Jordyn. When Jordyn died she wept with me, she gave me space to mourn, but never let go of me. After we moved from Virginia we continued to stay in touch. For a while we drifted a little, but we always found ourselves reconnecting and grew closer. The last 3 years we have chatted online nearly every day, until that fateful day in August. Chad had his accident on a Sunday and Thursday morning around 1 AM, Rebekah went home to our Savior. She had been in the hospital to have her spleen removed in hopes of it putting her the ITP (platelett disorder) into remission. Wednesday surgery had been postponed because of her passing out that morning until Friday. Wednesday night though she started having trouble breathing and xrays showed multiple pulmonary embolisms. Treatment didn't work and she slipped into the arms of our Savior. My heart hurts, Thursday willl be 8 weeks since she left this earth and I still have a hard time believing she's really gone, that I'll never hear her voice again, see her words being typed in front of my face, no hugs again, etc. She was a dedicated mom, she'd fought for a marriage that her husband had walked out on years ago and had come to the decision that she was going to move on and live her life the best she could without him, was finishing up her degree. She was simply put...amazing. The greatest thing about her, her heart for Jesus. I'm so thankful that she knew Jesus and had a relationship with him, so reassuring to know where she's at.
My other best friend is Tami. We met 10 years ago when Jordyn died and her Sydney died. We met on an online support group for parents who'd lost a child who died from cancer. We instantly bonded, initially it was because of our common loss, but it grew so much stronger. We were both unexpectantly pregnant with boys, who are only 1 1/2 months apart. We met aprox 2 years after Jordyn and Sydney died, in person. She's one of the most amazing people I've ever met. She understands me unlike most people. I can tell her anything and know she's not going to judge me.
The last one would be Bobbie. She's my Army wife best friend. I've never had a friend like her. We're like sisters. So much alike, yet enough differences to keep it fun and interesting. Her son is the same age as Jacob and they were best friends and her daughter is 7 months older than Emma and they loved each other deeply. She moved 2 years ago and I can't even find the words to describe how much I miss her. I find myself still in tears from time to time wanting their family to be back here with us. We were together literally almost every day. Walking, working out together, making dinner together, sports for our kids, fun activities, going to the park, PWOC, Hospitality House, you name it we did it together. Sometimes I have to make myself not think about her, because the pit in my stomach just hurts too much.
I have many other near and dear friends and am so blessed by them.

Day 6 {Your Day}

You'll understand the pictures once you've read the entry!

Well I got to sleep in this morning with Noah which was great. I got up at 10 AM *(see told you I slept in!!). Got up, checked email and facebook, nursed Noah, talked with the other kids, got Emma dressed. Did a couple other things (that I can't remember!) then decided that as much as I didn't want to had to figure out a costume to wear to the babyshower I was going to that said to dress up in a halloween costume! All of us attending are Christians, so no worries of being in something scary or anything. I wanted something fun and that I had around the house. I looked online and nothing and then I went to my closet and saw it....my Great Grandma's dress that she gave me. It was a classic grandma dress! So...I doned my grandma dress, put on some lovely blue eye shadow, and then I put baby powder in my hair! LOL The baby shower ended up being a blast and it was so fun to see everyone coming in all dressed up. We had a rocker, a girl from the 80's, the Virgin Mary (who's name is actually Mary and is actually pregnant, but with baby #3 lol), a house keeper, an authentic German in a dreidle, a fun (almost clown) lady, a rose bush and her dog was a bumble bee (rofl), a high schooler, and the momma to be was a pirate wench. We made bibs for the baby to be (which we don't know if it's a girl or a boy), bottle filled with m&m's that we had to guess how many, and then it was present time. Afterwards I came home and Chad was sorting through the stuff we have in our garage and he'd made great progress! Before we couldn't get into the garage without stretching over things into a small, narrow walkway, now there's a nice wide opening and a nice large walk way! (We're going back out tomorrow to work some more!) Emma got to go with one of Chad's soldiers downtown, she took her shopping and was going to get her nails done, but they ran out of time (so they're going on Monday lol). Jack was asked to spend the night at our neighbors and Emma was as well, so once she got home she ate and then went to the neighbors to spend the night. Jacob's having a friend spend the night here. Noah's passed out on Chad as I type this! It was a good day! :)

Day 5 {Your Definition of Love}

I have read a lot of people find this one kind of hard to answer, but to me it's easy. I can sum it all up in one word: JESUS. You can not know what real love is, if you don't know Jesus and when you know him you can know what love is. His love for me is so deep he died for me. As a mother I would die for my children, if I could have traded places with Jordyn I would have. If I could have taken 1 second of pain from her, I would have. I know that without Jesus I could never know what love truly is. How thankful I am to know my Savior, to have a relationship with him, to have his love.

Day 4

So I got a little behind! ;) I'm going to do a few days today, but in seperate entries.

Day 4 is what did I eat today. Ok seriously this is probably the dumbest question for this sort of thing, but I'll play along! :)

I didn't get up until late (love cosleeping) so I didn't end up having breakfast. I had a baby shower at 1 so I waited to eat until there. I had pigs in a blanket, fresh veggies, meatballs in bbq sauce (mmmm), and spice cake cupcakes with cream cheese frosting ( mmmm....mmmmm). For dinner we had chicken and mac n cheese.

Day 3.....My Parents

My parents. Well they're still married (I know rare) and have been for 34 years. They met via my mom's step-cousin who was my dad's best friend. J took my dad over to my mom's house and that's when they met. They dated in high school and the year my mom graduated they were married that November. I came a little over a year later and my brother was the following year.

My dad is ultimately a laid back man. He's worked hard his whole life providing. My mom is a woman who has very low self esteem (thanks to a very unkind step-mother, her biological mom died when she was only 2)...the damage that woman did left is a life long effect. I don't have a good relationship with my mother, which in turn makes not a fabulous one with my dad either. I love them, but my boundaries with them are VERY,VERY,VERY HIGH and contact with them is extremely limited.

Day 2-First Love

Wahoo...I'm doing day 2!! :)

My first love wow...well I think now looking back I had a lot more infatuations and really,really like vs love. I'd say my first true honest to goodness LOVE wasn't until I was in college (but hanging my head down very low thinking of all the boys I "thought" I loved and how easily I tossed that word around). The first love would be Mike Shirley. He and I met through a friend and his co-worker. Mike was in the Army. We dated for aprox a year. He was ultimately a good guy, but we just were not meant to be by any means and I ultimately was the one who broke up with him. . The relationship ran its toll. We both thought we were going to end up getting married even. We talked about it often, and he was the first to bring it up. I'm truly so grateful that we did not make that mistake.
The last I heard, he got out of the Army and married a girl who had a toddler. She lived in Kansas and he was from Oregan and I can't imagine they are in Ks if they're still married, because he deseperately wanted to go back to Oregan when we were together.
Wow, I hadn't thought about him in a very long time!!

30 Days of Me

Well, I've watched as others have done it and I'm going to do it too! :)
Thirty Days of me. Hopefully I can do 30 straight days of me, but if not...oh well the world won't end! :)


Day 1 Introduce Yourself....

Well....I'm Christy. First things first is that I'm a CHRISTIAN. Next I'm a Wife to Chad. Third I'm a Mom to: Jordyn who was dx with AML leukemia 6 days before her 1st birthday and 14 months later went home to Jesus. I'm also Mom to Jacob, Jackson, Emma, and Noah. I live in Germany (my hubby's in the Army) and have for the last 5 years and love it and honestly if we could afford to retire and stay here I would, but well it's expensive to live here without the support of the Army, so I don't see that happening, unless GOD calls for bigger things than what I see so far! (I wouldn't be against it that's for sure).

I was born and raised for the most part in Kansas. I LOVE and mean LOVE Wheat fields, especially in the evening as the wind picks up just slightly and starts blowing the wheat, there's just something so peaceful about it.

As a kid my dad was laid off of work and he did what he had to, my parents bought a travel trailer and he worked building railroad tracks in Wisconsin, Illinois, and Iowa. He also worked out in the oil fields, which we lived in Texas and Oklahoma. Both jobs required a lot of moving. I went to 5 schools for kindergarten. My 5th was back in KS because my mom saw how hard it was on me to be moving every couple of months. She told my dad that she was not leaving him, but was moving home to Kansas. Well, my dad quit and we all moved back to Kansas as a family.

I'm the oldest of 2. I have a brother who's a year younger than me. As kids we fought constantly. I honestly couldn't stand my brother for most of my childhood. Once in high school I started to appreciate him and see him as a good guy. After high school we became friends and now I can say that I am so proud of him, love him, and just think he's an awesome guy all around. He's a devoted husband and dad to my beautiful 2 nieces. He works full time at a Cardiac Center as well as going to school full time (taking 17 hours right now), to be a trauma nurse and then he'd like to go on in his schooling and become an anestisiologist (sorry if I mispelled).

I'm a Stay at home, homeschooling mom. I love it. I'm thankful GOD has called me into this calling, this job (and it IS a job), this passion.