Monday, December 28, 2009

Not Me Monday

I haven't done this in a while but after the last few days figured why not!

I was not extremely ill starting on Christmas Eve, having to actually miss our Christmas Eve service, send my family without me (it's my favorite service of the year, beautiful and truly focused on the LORD).

I was not able to stay up right long enough Christmas morning to take pictures of the kids open their gifts and then lay down for the most part of the day.

I am most definitely not thankful that this year my husbad was home and not deployed (as he was last year!) and able to help with our family dinner, and just taking care of everything in general.

I did not love it a few minutes ago when Emma walked up to me and said "look Mommy, I'm a fishy" and proceded to give me a fishy kiss!

I am not going to do the normaly "not me" for this last one.

I am so thankful that Jesus is my Savior and that my husband and I are raising our children to know and love our LORD. Oh how blessed we are!

Thursday, December 24, 2009

I've always loved the Christmas Carol, Silent Night. What many American's do not know is it's original language is German. It was written by an Austrian Priest, Josef Moher. I'll be sharing the You Tube so you can hear it in it's original version, which is so beautiful. In PWOC and at our Candle Light service at our Chapel on Christmas Eve we sing it in English and German, there's something so beautiful about it. (Scroll down to see the words in German and English)

I pray you each have a beautiful and blessed Christmas and that you will remember WHY we celebrate this day, we celebrate the birth of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.

1. Stille Nacht! Heil'ge Nacht!
Alles schläft; einsam wacht
Nur das traute hoch heilige Paar. Holder Knab' im lockigen Haar,
: Schlafe in himmlischer Ruh! :

2. Stille Nacht! Heil'ge Nacht!
Gottes Sohn, o wie lacht
Lieb' aus deinem göttlichen Mund,
Da uns schlägt die rettende Stund'.
: Jesus in deiner Geburt! :

3. Stille Nacht! Heil'ge Nacht!
Die der Welt Heil gebracht,
Aus des Himmels goldenen Höhn,
Uns der Gnaden Fülle läßt sehn,
: Jesum in Menschengestalt! :

4. Stille Nacht! Heil'ge Nacht!
Wo sich heut alle Macht Väterlicher Liebe ergoß,
Und als Bruder huldvoll umschloß
: Jesus die Völker der Welt! :

5. Stille Nacht! Heil'ge Nacht!
Lange schon uns bedacht,
Als der Herr vom Grimme befreit
In der Väter urgrauer Zeit
: Aller Welt Schonung verhieß! :

6. Stille Nacht! Heil'ge Nacht!
Hirten erst kundgemacht
Durch der Engel Alleluja,
Tönt es laut bei Ferne und Nah:
: "Jesus der Retter ist da!" :

In English:

Silent Night! Holy Night!
All is calm, all is bright
Round yon godly tender pair.
Holy infant with curly hair,
Sleep in heavenly peace,
Sleep in heavenly peace.

Silent Night! Holy Night!
Son of God, love's pure light
Radiant beams from thy holy face,
With the dawn of redeeming grace,
Jesus, Lord at thy birth
Jesus, Lord at thy birth.

Silent Night! Holy Night!
Brought the world gracious light,
Down from heaven's golden height
Comes to us the glorious sight:
Jesus, as one of mankind,
Jesus, as one of mankind.

Silent Night! Holy Night!
By his love, by his might
God our Father us has graced,
As a brother gently embraced
Jesus, all nations on earth,
Jesus, all nations on earth.

Silent Night! Holy Night!
Long ago, minding our plight
God the world from misery freed,
In the dark age of our fathers decreed:
All the world redeemed, All the world redeemed.

Silent Night! Holy Night!
Shepherds first saw the sight
Of angels singing alleluia
Calling clearly near and far:
Christ, the saviour is born,
Christ the Saviour is born.

Monday, December 21, 2009

Earlier this month we had pictures done at our Community Activities Center (CAC), which is where the photography studio is located. In our 4 1/2 years here we've been so blessed to have amazingly talented ladies as photographers there. We are now on our 3rd photographer there (they're all or have been Army wives...the first her husband got out of the Army, the 2nd just recently transferred stateside, the 3rd is here now!), so turn over is not too high, but there none the less. So this was our first honest to goodness session with our new photographer. She'd taken a quick photo a while back and then again the Santa photo's the day before our scheduled session. I had friends who'd had her take theirs and they were fabulous...well I was thrilled with the session, and it was fast, possibly our fastest ever! We're at a good age with the kids where they all pretty well pose as asked (including Emma!). Chad decided at the last minute that he wanted a family photo and thankfully she was fine with it (the photographer). So here they are! :)

Thursday, December 17, 2009

Christmas Traditions

I found this from Christy Rose's blog.....
I didn't grow up with a ton of traditions, but nothing was ever focused on the REAL reason for this day. The birth of Christ. I read a comment on a friends blog and that commenter said her husband said he'd noticed there were not a lot of crosses up and she said "it's because it's about his birth and not his death". That is true, but it is about his death as well. Without Christ's birth, he couldn't live and spread the gospel, and he wouldn't have died on the cross to give us the hope and more importantly the promise of Salvation. It all goes hand in hand. Teaching our children WHY we celebrate Christ's birthday and why December 25 is such a special day for our family and to so many other Christians. We teach our children to say Merry Christmas, no Happy Holiday's in our family. To say I'm anything but politically correct is putting it lightly! ;) Would it be vain to say I really like that about myself? That's actually another post in itself!!
With that though we have started our own traditions, when Chad and I got married and began our family. So here are the important ones! :)

Reading from Luke about Christ's birth.
We open one gift on Christmas Eve (new pj's)
Since living in Germany our chapel does a Christmas Eve service so we always attend. It's a candle light service and it's so beautiful!
We pull the nativity set down and talk to the kids about it and share that (can't get that in their heads enough!)
We pray as a family, sharing what we're thankful for, and thank GOD for humbling himself to be born of a virgin girl in a stable! To think he KNEW where he'd be born as well as where and how he'd die.
While living in Germany something has become very important to me, I want Christmas Day to be focused on the Lord and our family. I like it to be quiet and as nonstressful as possible. I want to just feel gratitude that day especially.

Our lives are often full of so much uncertainty, but one thing that is never to be doubted is Christ, who he is, why he was, and what he means to me. How thankful I am for the birth of Christ, that he choose me to be his child, that he forgives me for my transgressions against him daily, for his love.

Tuesday, December 08, 2009

I'm going to blow

Let me start with this: I love my kids. I'm just so very, very frustrated with them today. Every Tuesday I have practice for our Praise team with PWOC, as a homeschooling Mom, they go with me of course. For some reason they just will not behave while we're there at the chapel. They loose all sense, misbehave, and just frustrate the living daylights out of me. Today was the worst I think they've ever behaved. I met Chad on the way home and just lost it. The tears were coming and I just could not stop them. Sometimes I just want to throw the towel in. I wonder what I'm doing? I'm obviously not doing something, or many things right for them to behave like this. I am feeling extremely overwhelmed and honestly just sad.
I'm thankful for a husband who just lets me get it out and encourages me to keep crying, knowing it was a stress relief for me.

Sometimes I just quetion if I'm cut out for all of this. Is this really the plans GOD has for me? I always have wanted to be a mom. I could never drop them off at daycare, I know GOD has us homeschooling for a reason, I just need a break. I'm tired, emotionally and physically. Maybe I'm not soft enough when it comes to mothering. I feel myself screwing all of this up, fear they'll hate me, or worse have the same feelings about me as I do about my mom. I don't want that. Are my expectations too high, or maybe not high enough? It's time for this momma, this woman, for me to do some major soul searching and just shut up and listen to GOD and really hear him.

Monday, December 07, 2009

So have I told you that I'm 14 1/2 weeks pregnant now? I'm still nausious and very tired, but it's really not bad. I am hoping that the morning sickness and nausea will start disappearing, but who knows, with every pregnancy it's different, and I can say that for pregnancy #5 it's been different than my 1st,2nd,3rd,and 4th and they were each different from each other as well.

I do really like my ob. I'm seeing a different one this pregnancy and am so glad. I had instant ease, no argument...I should say no discussion at all about having my tubes tied (it's something GOD convicted me and Chad about...we 100% trust GOD with our family and that means no birth control or sterialization for either of us). I know we're rare, to fully trust GOD! Anyways, my ob has said nothing about it and he knows all my others were born via c-section. I wish you all understand what a relief it is to not have to rehash that fight I had with my last OB. Chad had to raise his voice with my last OB when she continued to argue with me.

My scanner is not hooked up to my laptop, hopefully we'll find the cd for my scanner/printer and I can scan my u/s. It's a perk of having a baby in Germany....ultrasounds at every appointment. I love getting to see my baby growing at every apt. Last week at my apt. the baby was kicking her/his legs a lot. We've also decided to NOT find out if we're having a boy or a girl. We do not share names we're discussing (we make the decision once we see the baby for the first time).

God Bless,

Saturday, December 05, 2009

This and That

Hello! Well Friday was the day we said goodbye (for now) to our dear friends Heather and family. I took them to the airport and managed to not cry until I was back in my van alone. Let me tell you it was quite the feat, because I'm known to cry easily and not ashamed to shed those tears.

I get back to post and Chad's called to say that at final formation (which was at 11 AM yesterday) they were going to have me "pin" him (he was promoted) so ultimately I got to go and rip off (it's all velcro now) his old rank and slap on the new one! :)

Yesterday we had professional photo's taken. I hadn't had the kids 8 yr, 6 yr, or 2 yr photo's done this year (BAD Mom) so we did those all in one session along with a family photo, and 1 of the 3 kids. We go to the Community Activity Center (CAC) to have our photo's done, since being stationed here they've had 3 photographers. This was our first time with the newest (3rd) photographer and she did a great job and it went very quickly. All three kids were really cooperative, did what they were told and just make it all very easy. I was truly so thrilled with how they behaved and very proud of them.
After photo's Chad and the boys played some pool then he took them to see Planet 51, which they loved! When they got home we finished putting the lights on our tree and decorating it, then it was time for Christmas Card photo's! I have had my camera for 10 months and still just have so much to learn about it. I did my first timer photo's of our family with it, and am really happy with them. I actually used my tripod for the first time last night and sadly I've had it for months and so should have used it before this. So here's a few photo from last night...

This photo Jackson was actually behind the camera/tripod and took of Chad and I.
Once again I'm having our cards made by my friend Tiffany. If you're looking for a unique and one of a kind (and very beautiful) Christmas Card or other unique gifts, Tiffany's your girl. She unfortunately had to take her website down, hopefully only temporarily, but if you're interested in seeing her work and possibly have her make you a card (which she only charges $10.00!) let me know and I'll share her facebook page she's created for her designs!

Thursday, December 03, 2009

It's So Hard To Say Goodbye

It seems like just yesterday I was saying goodbye to the best friend I've ever met/made as an Army Wife and as a woman in general. Tomorrow, well since it's after midnight here now technically today...I have to say goodbye to the 2nd best friend as an Army wife. My dear, sweet, friend Heather is leaving. For those who've been reading me for the last couple of years you will remember Heather's the one we almost lost, when she went into a coma and remained comatosed (eventually it was medically induced) for 4 weeks. GOD has blessed me so much here at our duty station here in Germany. He's given me some of the most amazing Army wife and civilian friends I've ever had. Let me tell you though, when you find these women who not only become great friends, but sisters of the heart. To watch them leave hurts tremendously, but tonight my heart is aching for my Emma. She loves Heather and her family. She literally in the last 2 weeks has told us over and over "I love Miss Heather" and then proceeds to go through how she loves everyone in her family. How do you explain to a two year old that people she see's as family are leaving her and won't be back? That she'll be able to talk to them on the phone but won't get to go to their home or have them come to ours anymore? In the morning my kids will have to tell them goodbye and my heart is aching. I hate goodbyes.
Pray for our friends as they transition back to the states, for a safe and uneventful flight. Pray for my Emma and both of my boys as well, and if you can say a small one for me I'd be so grateful.

Saturday, November 21, 2009


It's upon us! I LOVE Thanksgiving. I love having a day to focus on being Thankful. I really enjoy making dinner! Oh how I enjoy it! I love cooking the turkey, making homemade noodles, from scratch stuffing, broccoli casserole, homemade bread, Chad does the mashed potatoes, corn, cranberry sauce (Christmas I'm going to make from scratch cranberry sauce, I just got a recipe for it). I'll be making a Chocolate pie and a Double Layer Pie. My friend who's coming over is making the green bean casserole. We'll have appetizers of cheeses, crackers, fresh broccoli, cauliflower, cherry tomatoes, dips, and chips. Nothing fancy, but will stave off the starving! We're having my friend over as I mentioned and her two little boys, her husband just recently deployed so I'm so thankful to bless them. We're having some single soldiers over as well. I'm making a huge turkey (20 lbs) and I plan to make up some plates for the soldiers who have to work Staff Duty.

We have a few games to play with adults and kids can join as well! Chad bought Apples to Apples tonight, which is one of my favorite games and can be played with a large or small group! We're going to buy the Junior version for the kids for Christmas!

I have to say that I feel so blessed to be living here in Germany, especially when it comes to Thanksgiving and Christmas. There's no extended family pulling us to come to be with them. My family lives in Kansas. Chad's family lives in Ohio. We've already discussed that when we retire (we'll retire in KS) we will have the meal at our home every other year and on the off year we'll take turns of going to ones family. On our years we'll of course invite our extended family to join us, but if they don't, they don't. I don't want my children's memories of us having to travel all over the place, but instead have memories of laughter and praising and celebrating GOD in our home. I feel that's so important.

I hope you each have a blessed Thanksgiving. That you can praise Jesus for him being your Savior (and I pray he's each of your Savior) that you can be thankful for where GOD's placed you. That you can thank GOD for being an American or living in the US and celebrating Thanksgiving. I wonder if the Pilgrims ever imagined this day of thankfulness and celebration would still be going on after so many years!

Thursday, November 19, 2009

Secrets how I despise thee

Does the title say it all? I don't like secrets. I think they hurt people, destroy relationships, and when it's in a group setting, it destroys trust and moral.
In the last many months, certain people that I am around keep having secrets. It's a board that I'm on and have been on this particular board 4 times with various people, in various situations. There have been tensions on the board in the past, especially a couple years ago when 2 of them disliked each other so completely. But here's the thing, it was NO SECRET. They didn't like each other and the other knew about that mutual feelings of dislike, like I said it was not a secret. It made for some tense meetings at times, but there was no guessing.
This year though, I can say personally I've not enjoyed being on the board and am right now praying whether I'll be staying or not. Yes I made a committment, but at what price. I came home today and my stomach was such a mess, and I just found myself so emotional and so drained. I haven't talked to Chad about it yet, we'll talk tonight. I'm just truly disheartened and frustrated, and wondering why the need for secrets, especially when the secrets are over things so petty, other than what I personally view as being a control issue. Had I realized how things were going to be, I'd have never applied for this position, never accepted it.
Will you pray for me as I seek GOD's will here and search for his guidance in this decision.

Thursday, November 12, 2009

Thank you for your comments and love and support. I was definitely having a hard day, they come and go and I know that as long as Satan is in this world, that will come and go, but the one thing I have to cling to, no cleave my Savior....Jesus Christ. Do you know him? If the answer is Yes, so wonderful, the bigger question though is "Do you have a relationship with him?" If you answered no to the first question, I would love to pray with you, share with you about the Lord I know, I love, and can NOT live without. If you answered yes to the first but no to the 2ND part of that question, I'd love to pray with you and walk with you as you develop a relationship with him.

You may or may not know my story. I'm more than an Army wife and mom to soon to be 5 children. When people look at me what they see is an Army wife and Mom of 3 soon to be 4, because our oldest daughter is in Heaven with Jesus right now. I've known the depths of grief and heartache. I still deal with those, but even on my worst days I know I have hope, because I have Christ to lean on. I know that when my heart is literally aching for Heaven so I can be with my Lord and my girl, my Savior is right beside me holding me as I weep. It's been 9 1/2 years since I last held Jordyn. It's been 9 1/2 years since cancer, leukemia (AML leukemia) killed my 2 year old little girl. Although it's been 9 1/2 years, somedays it feels like yesterday that I last held her in my arms as she took her last breath. But even on those days where it feels like yesterday and I can't breath and my heart is heavy, I have hope that tomorrow will be better.

I hope each of you have the Hope you can ONLY have in Jesus Christ, if you don't I'd love to pray for you.

In His.....

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Crying Out

I'm truly curious how many people hide their true feelings, how many skip the little and even the big details of their life happenings, because it really doesn't feel like anyone, besides GOD cares. He's the only one that ultimately matters the most, yet I think we ALL desire to have others not only listen to the big, little, and mundane things in our life...but to CARE and actually WANT to hear about it all.
I don't want to have a pity party here, I want to be really honest. I feel really, really lonely. I started thinking about this last night and it's just eating at me. Chad's not asked me any details on how my week went last week. I will give him the benefit of insanity. He took on the huge task of changing rooms and we're still literally in the midst of that decision of moving toys, laundry, and other effects between the two rooms, as well as getting laundry done that's out of control, etc. Yet, to be completely honest it hurts that he has not asked me once. I've had a couple friends ask how it went, yet maybe it's just me, but it doesn't feel like they really want to know all the details. I know this is Satan, telling me "you're not important. Nothing you have to say really means that much. Other people are far more interesting, intelligent, funny, beautiful, kind, honest, pure, lovely. You are none of those things." I get that those are from Satan. I know it, but wow it's hard to push him out. I keep praying to HEAR GOD tell me that I'm "loved, important, wonderfully made"...I'm struggling to hear him right now. I often feel like I'm in this battle alone. I often feel like I'm supposed to be the person that everyone can come to, but that I get to share a little and then it's time to shut up. Or I find myself being honest say on facebook and then getting slammed by someone who's not spoken to me hardly at all since college (we went to high school together), telling me how wrong my walk is with Christ and how she has 2 Christian friends who do it right because they don't share OUTLOUD their walk, but do it quietly and how when I'm honest and yes even maybe ugly in my opinions, that I'm just not showing I'm a "good Christian". Let me just say this: "Ouch". She doesn't know me, but takes my 2 strong opinions that I've shared and just shoved my face and my heart right into the ground and then stomped all over it. It's made ME feel that I have to be one way or I'm dettering someone's walk with Christ. I don't EVER want to be a person that pushes someone away from Christ, yet part of me really wants to ask "when do YOU take responsibility for your OWN WALK?" Maybe I'm wrong, most likely I am wrong in that thought, in that opinion.

I am crying out to JESUS right now. I long for him. I ache for him. I want to feel him close to me. I want to know I'm not alone in this life, especially when I feel so alone (like right now).

Just The Way You Are

I came across this this video on Heather's blog. Isn't this what we all want to hear, isn't this exactly what our daughter's deserve to hear from us as parents?! What a promise of truth, we're beautiful just the way GOD made us! God whispers this to us constantly, that we're beautiful just the way he made us and we don't need all the extra's of hair die, makeup, hair straighteners, curling irons, face lifts, etc. GOD made us in HIS IMAGE, which makes us perfectly beautiful just the way we are. Does that mean I'm not going to use make up ever again, does mean though that it's not going to make me "more or better" because of it. Nothing I do on the outside is going to change who I am on the inside, and most of all it will not change how GOD see's me!
I'm blessed to have a Father who loves me just the way I am. ("Father=GOD....father=my earthly dad). I have a husband who loves how I look with and without make up, with and without my hair done up. I am more blessed than I could have ever imagined, and I want that for Emma and any other future daughters...for her (them) to know they're always beautiful...inside and out no matter what they do and don't do with make up or hairstyles or clothing (although we'll be teaching her to dress modestly). I want that same lesson for our boys too. For them to know we love them just the way they are, just as GOD created them.

Saturday, November 07, 2009

Worship and Study...PWOC Style

I had the most amazing week this past week! I am on our local board for PWOC (Protestant Women of the Chapel) which is a miilitary wide women's bible study, which began 54 years ago here in Germany, by some wonderful Army wives who felt the need to have an official bible study!! Since moving here I've been a part of our local chapter of PWOC and have been blessed all over the place and am so thankful. Last week was the annual Worship and Study. We stay at a 4 Star Hotel, our local chapter is VERY blessed because none of the 8 of us who went had to pay a single dime for our accomadations or the event itself. A Christian book store comes so we all have the opportunity to pick up (for one dear friend even SMELL) and look at books and other items we want to purchase (and purchase I did! LOL). We had a special singer who's husband is retired Air Force and a special speaker (writer/speaker) Cindi Woods. Then we had smaller classes we took. On Tuesday I took a great class that was all about ice breakers and different sorts of games to play and get to know the ladies in our local chapter of PWOC. We had another small group class that day, which was learning the signing (sign language) to our PWOC song of the year "Sing To The King", well that would have to be my BIG disappointment of the year, the lady mixed different signing versions, didn't really actually TEACH, but would turn on the song and start signing and we had to try to learn that way. I left that class frustrated and not knowing it, and my friend who's not an expert at signing, but does it pretty well, was so frustrated by all of it since she's the one who KNEW the lady was mixing things up, not giving the correct signs. So that class was a bust. We then had a general session with the special music and speaker, the speaker was an author/speaker: Cindi Woods. She was ok. Everyday she seemed to get better and better.
The other two small group classes I took over the next two days was "Preparing to be the Bride" I LOVED this class and wish the lady who taught it was stationed here in Germany, but her husband ( a chaplain) is of course retired and they live in the states. I took tons of notes and was just so moved by that class. The last class was on "Becoming a Bold Prayer Warrior" word: WOW! Not a single woman in that class left there dry eyed. It was the most moving, emotional, and powerful class I took. There were 3 other women from our group in the class with me and we all just left there almost stunned with emotion. We truly released it all over to GOD, I know without a doubt that I have NEVER allowed myself to go to GOD in the way I did! The teacher literally prayed over every single one of us, and wouldn't let us leave with out one last small prayer and hug! It was amazing. I still get chills just thinking about that class. Oh I wish each and everyone of you, that you could have experienced that class, most of all...that experience with GOD and with other women who love the LORD! There was a woman singing praises to GOD, speaking praises to Jesus loudly, one speaking in tongues, all of us crying. I hope, truly hope that each of you have this experience with GOD, through prayer...through conversation and love for our Lord, Jesus Christ.

I came home and it's like coming down from a high. My husband took on a task that was far more than he expected. He decided to switch our bedroom with our rooms, and paint what is now our new room! He's still not done! LOL He has until Wednesday night to finish things, because housing comes to check all the fire alarms and making sure they're working properly! Today I got my living room cleaned up, Chad removed totes that were in the boys room out of the kitchen (yes you read that right, he put them in the kitchen! LOL). Tomorrow the boys and I will be getting the dining room, kitchen, and bathroom cleaned and I'll be doing laundry, we have lots of laundry. Have I mentioned how much I dislike laundry? My #1 detested household chore.

Friday, October 30, 2009

It's Fall Fest time!! :)

Well this Kansas girl got her Wizard of Oz theme! Emma aka Dorothy got into Jack's, Scarecrow makeup and she got a HUGE glob all over her face, on the front of her shirt, dress, and then when we got home found there was some on the back. It'll come out, but let me just say that when I discover it 10 minutes before we were heading out the door, I flipped out, started crying, and thankfully Chad got it all out, while I put the silver make up on Jacob (The Tin Man).

Other than that little mess, all went wonderfully. Everyone loved our theme and the costumes. I didn't make them, I can't sew (wish I could and will learn one of these days). We had a lot of fun though. The Chapel and MWR (Moral, Welfare, and Recreation) sponsored it, so no scary or inappropriate costumes!! So it's a safe and truly fun event and alternative to Halloween.

Monday, October 26, 2009

Field Trip

We went on a field trip today! We drove over to Coburg, which is about 45 minutes from our post and went to the Veste. The Veste is a castle which is really great in itself, as you can explore a ton of the rooms (fairly rare and even take pictures although w/o a for me not great photo's although I did take them and will have them up Wednesday..that's my goal!). What's even more fascinating about Veste is that Martin Luther (you know the Reformer of the Luthern/Protestant church?!) he hid there for 6 months.
The castle is over 500 years old. Our family has been there once before. This time though it was just the kids and I and other homeschool families from our post, and we had a guided tour (in English of course).

It's always amazing and so humbling that we live in a place that is so full of history. From the way we practice our religion and worship our Lord Jesus. The wars that have ravaged this country, this continent. We literally live in history, the beauty of it and the ugliness of it. We live in the land of castles and cathedrals (more commonly known as Doms). It's stunning and humbling all at the same time.

Chad and I truly believe GOD brought us to Germany for this time in our life and we love it here, we love to travel, explore, and learn. We're also so humbled that he wants us to learn lessons here, in such great beauty and sadness. We live in a country that over 60 years ago Hitler ruled. I have friends who's grandparents were alive during WWII and shared some stories. Last spring during PWOC in the bible study class I took we were talking about WWII and the concentration camps and how it wasn't that the German's didn't know what was going on, and it wasn't that they weren't speaking up, but that they COULDN'T speak up, without the knowledge that they too would be arrested and taken to a prison camp themselves. Can you imagine knowing the horrors that were happening in your backyard, but not being able to actually tell anyone what was happening, because those in charge were the ones guilty of those horrors. Honestly it wasn't anything I'd ever thought about or truly considered.

I'm humbled and grateful for where GOD's brought us, and humbled to think of where he'll take us next.

Saturday, October 24, 2009

Flashback Music Friday

I know it's not Friday, but my friend Kelly has a new game going on! You have until Sunday to play!! Go to youtube and find a song that takes you back be it the 50's, 60's, 70's, 80's, or even the 90's! Post it, link it back to Kelly's Mr. Linky and if your link is picked (generated by Mr. Linky" you'll win a $10.00 gift card from either Itunes or Napster!

Here's Mine:

Sylvia singing "Nobody"

Friday, October 23, 2009

Big expanding news

Did I happen to mention to all of you that I'm pregnant??? I'm 8 weeks today. I'm insanely tired and very nauseated with a little morning sickness. Number 5 is due June 3, but she or he will come 1 to 2 weeks before that, because I have to have a c-section (all of mine have been c-sections so unfortunately no chance of a vaginal delivery). I need to go pick up my referral on Monday so I can call and make my drs apt. (where we are stationed we don't have OB's that work at our little clinic so we have to go off post and see a German dr, thankfully we have a list of about 10 to choose from). I should get an ultra sound at the apt. the beauty of Germany is they do them at every single apt, so I should have a few that I'll share. :)
We are really excited, and I think I "feel" more excited when I start getting some energy back. I've NEVER been so tired during a pregnancy before at this stage.

God Bless

Thursday, October 22, 2009

Berlin pictures finally :)

I know, I know it took me long enough huh?! We went almost 2 weeks ago and let me tell you it was amazing. We really loved Berlin, far more than I expected to, to be honest with you! I actually am all for going back again, because there is still so much we want to see and explore!
We stayed at a great apartment. It wasn't huge, but it was a nice little apartment for the 4 days we were there. There was a bedroom with a king size bed that Chad, Emma, and I slept in, the living room had a couch that made out into a bed for the boys, a computer, flat screen tv, stove top, dishwasher, sink, a table, and a full bathroom. We were on the 1st floor which was great so we didn't have a ton of stairs to go up and down. We took Bentley with us and discovered that Berlin is the capitol of dogs! (Germans love their dogs!!)

For now, there will not be a ton of captions of where we were, mostly because off the top of my head I can't remember all of the places and don't have time to look it up, maybe I'll come back later and give captions!

Monday, October 19, 2009

Not Me Monday

I haven't played "Not Me Monday" for quite a while.... but here goes!

We did not go to Berlin last weekend and I still have NOT posted pictures that I promised to post in only a couple days afterwards, no I'm more on top of things than that!

We do not live in an area of Germany that does not get much snow and yet we surely did not already get our first snow of the year, in the MIDDLE of OCTOBER! I was not secretly excited that Jackson's soccer game was cancelled on Thursday because of that snow and the insane cold temps!

Jacob did NOT go to football practice on that same snowy Thursday and not take his gloves as was suggested by his wise mother, and did not come home in tears because his fingers were freezing. I was obviously sympathetic and did not tell him that hopefully he learned a hard lesson and would next time listen to his mother. (Ok maybe I was sympathetic, but still shared words of wisdom)

I did not surely go to Poland (yes the country) on Friday with my dear friend Heather and did not have a wonderful time buying pottery for myself as well as 2 of my friends! I do not enjoy shopping at all, especially shopping for polish pottery, I mean that's not fun!

I surely did not take pictures of my favorite shop so I could share with my friends and here on my blog to give you all a small glimpse of what the stores look like with pottery from floor to cieling!

Jacob did not have an awesome football game on Saturday. He did NOT sack the quarterback 8, count them EIGHT times and I am surely NOT a proud momma!

Thursday, October 15, 2009

Popping In

Sorry I haven't put pictures up yet, I'll get them up soon. I'm going to Poland tomorrow with my dear, sweet, friend Heather. I'll take pictures there too, so I have to get my battery for my camera charged, which of course died on our 3rd day in Berlin, since I stupidly forgot to check that before we left.

We really had a great time up in Berlin. It took us about 5 hours to get up there with a gas stop and a lunch stop on the way there. It took us a while to find the apartment we stayed at, but it wasn't too hard and was located in a great area. It was very close to bus, train, and subway stops. We had a stove top so we were able to cook dinner two out of the three nights we were there (we'd planned on eating out once while up there) and we took everything for sandwiches for lunches while we were out, although our last day there we ate out. So we were able to do Berlin for very cheaply!

We spent Saturday and Sunday sight seeing and Monday we went to the Berlin Zoo. We had wanted to get to a few other things, but it just was not possible. I will get photo's up this weekend!

Thursday, October 08, 2009

Here We Come: Berlin!

We're going to Berlin! We haven't been there so we're all really looking forward to it! I promise to take lots and lots of pictures and share!! We'll be hitting the typical tourist spots that American's go to of course...Check Point Charlie, Brandenburg Gate, The Berlin Wall and quite a few other places, we'll have 3 1/2 days to sight see.

"See" you when we return!

Friday, September 25, 2009

Until The Whole World Hears

Casting Crowns is one of my favorite Christian bands! They have a new album coming out in November and this is their current new song, powerful!

It's about safety

Here's a video I got from a friend:

Bethany, I'm sorry I forgot to send you those links, I'll try to get them to you this weekend (you may have to remind me (here or via facebook or email! LOL)

How can ANYONE think it's ok to put 25,000 times the levels of mercury that IS considered TOXIC in food or water. Come on, this is just simple common sense, it's NOT SAFE. It's not be safely tested and we do not know the short term effects, much less the long term effects. Just because it's "called" a vaccination does not make it automatically safe. I am NOT antivaccination, but I am anti this vaccination.

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Pray for the Sullivan's

I came across this blog tonight and have just ached for them. Sara Sullivan had breast cancer, courageously brought a beautiful baby girl into this world, and her husband Brady is now going to have to raise her without her Momma, who was called home for at this point, no known physical reason.

Saturday, September 19, 2009

Well child apts, crayons up the nose, and AWANA

Emma has her 2 yr well child check up. Now for some of you, you may GASP when you find out this was Emma's 2nd EVER well child check up! She got one when she was I believe 4 weeks old, got 2 shots and that was it, until Friday. With each of my children I learn more and more, sometimes my opinions and views stay the same, sometimes they change from night to day! Well with each I've found myself more and more on the road of delayed vaccinations, as well as with the thought that unless they are sick I am not taking my children into the clinic to only be exposed to what ever illness is on this post! (It's a small post, with a tiny clinic...something's always going around, seriously ALWAYS). So after a great deal of prayer and a ton of research I decided to wait on vaccinating Emma anymore, until she was two and her immune system was stronger and she would need fewer vaccinations! So first things first...she's the peanut that I've always known her to be! She weighs in at a tiny 24.6 lbs for those who are hung up, oh I mean like percentages...she's in the 11% for weight, at one point she was at 3%, but thriving and eating like a champ and her height was very low and she actually evened out, so no concerns! She hadn't had a huge drop, she was just very petite!!) Her height, she's TALL so she's thin and tall (she's living the dream ladies! ROFL..seriously just kidding! All I care about is she's healthy and happy), she's 33.3 inches tall which is in the 84.6 % for height! See Tall and thin! I have to say what's really funny is the day before she was in a little dress and her legs were so long, I couldn't get over it. I kept telling her "Emma when did your legs get so long?" She would just giggle and lift her leg above her head! (She's my CLASSY girl, I have to tell you...remember she was in a dress!!)

So while at the apt, I tell her dr that we noticed it looked like she had a small piece of paper up her nose, that we could not retrieve! He looks up and says "yes she does have a piece of paper up there" he left to go get his retrieval instrument and the nurse, who's this tiny little thing and I tell him "She's VERY strong, we may need more help, because I will NOT lay across her" so he has her go get another nurse (he had told her a particular name) in comes a nice strong male nurse!) he takes her body, while I hold her head still, talking to her and reassuring her she's going to be ok, wiping the tears away as she's SCREAMING "I scared, Mommy, I scared"....oh my heart (of course she was also scared before that because she had to lay on the drs table and she's in this stage of being terrified of all things that are not WIDE or the floor when she's laying aka HATES changing tables (Which is where the fear began). So anyways, the dr gets a tiny, itty bitty piece of it out of her nose and we still think it's paper, he goes in again (let me tell you this IS a skill btw!) and pulls it all out and it's NOT paper. It's white and the dr has no clue what it is, I look at it and knew immediately! It was the tip of a white crayon. You know the beautiful perfect top of a crayong when you first get it, from where the paper ends to the very tip, yep she had it all up in her nose! INSANE I tell you! I am not sure if she stuck it up there and it broke off then or it the tip had already broken off and she stuck it up there (either way would NOT surprise me! Oh that girl! So afterwards, we went back to the immunization clinic (I should say room!) so we go back and thankfully it's a NEW immunization nurse and I tell her we have delayed vaccinations and I want them one at a time, and she's great with it! (The total opposite of the last nurse that worked back there, who was horrible!) So that was great!! Emma got the Hep. B vax, she cried of course, but it was over fast and she got over it quickly and had no ill effects! Which I didn't expect her to. (I'm not anti-vaccinations..just pro-delayed...although I AM anti Flu shot and the new H1N1 flu vaccination and thinks EVERYONE needs to do their research on this new vaccination and have their facts before they allow something to be put into their body that has not even been created a year ago and right now there's a lot of information that's showing it's dangers and ones that I find convincing).

Jacob had his 2nd football game today and Jack had his 2nd soccer game Thursday. Thursday I forgot my camera. I need to download today's football photo's though. Jacob did well, he plays guard and hit HARD! I'm not sure what the score was, but we won! Last weeks game we scored more points than our team did all together the previous season! (The score last week was 32 (us) to 28). Jackson's soccer team does not keep score, although the kids sure do. Last week our team won, this week they didn't (Jack informed me! LOL).

Tomorrow (well it's officially today here in Germany!) we start back up on AWANA!! (Approved Workman Are Not Afraid -2 Timothy 2:15)! I love AWANA, LOVE IT!! I love seeing children learning GOD's word, love knowing that all these versus that they are memorizing are going into their hearts to stay for the rest of their life. I love that for some of these children, this is their only chance to learn about Jesus. I love that I can see my own children memorizing GOD's word, as we work on the verses throughout the week and then see via the records that they got them and go home and review them and keep on moving on to new verses! Most of the kids favorite time is Game time! Chad (my hubby) is the Games director and is always well loved by the kids!
So if you want to pray for all of us volunteers (I'm the Spark's Director) and most of all the kids!


Beth has written a very important blog entry, if you're a Christian, if you're an need to go read this...IMMEDIATELY. Here's the link and make sure to watch the Youtube video she has on there as well. This is no time for waiting, action is necessary.

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Jesus, Lover of My Soul

We sang this song today at PWOC and it's just one of my favorites. It's so simple and to the point.

Jesus, Lover of my soul: Hillsong

Jesus, Lover of my soul, Jesus, I will never let you go
You've taken me from the miry clay
You've set my feet upon the Rock, and now i know

I love you, I need you,
Though my world may fall, I'll never let you go
My Saviour, my closest friend, I will worship you until the very end(repeat)

Friday, September 11, 2009

Jackson update

God always amazes me. He gave us an answer quickly and almost unexpectantly. The PA we saw wasn't positive what it was, said that if it didn't show improvement after a while we could have him see the dermotologist. As I thought we were going to get ready to go, he said "I'll be right back" and comes back a moment later with the dermotologist, who looks at it and says immediately "it's Granuloma Annulare, it can sometimes look like ring worm, we don't really know what causes it, but they go away on their own, doesn't cause any issue, discomfort, etc" (Jack's other foot has what we thought was ring worm and we'd been treating it, although it hadn't been going away and had this odd bump in the center).
I'm so thankful that we didn't have to wait around waiting and wondering. He did say it could take a few months to up to a year for them to go away, so we just wait for them to go away. I have to say that although it's odd, I can take odd! LOL

Thursday, September 10, 2009


I try not to worry, no seriously I make a conscience effort to not never gets me anywhere but stressed out and we're directly instructed by GOD not to worry. So saying that, I will say that I have fallen into the sin and found myself worrying. I can say I'm normally pretty good at pulling myself out of it and reminding myself of GOD's promises. So.....with that brings up Jackson. We went camping this weekend and on Sunday Chad and I noticed he had these strange bumps on his foot, they're hard (actually feelsl ike bone), they don't hurt him, he hadn't even really noticed them until we noticed and mentioned them to him. Knowing he hadn't had them the day before I knew I needed to bring him into the clinic and have someone check them out. Tuesday I called the clinic and got an apt. for Friday morning at 8:30 AM (let me remind all of you that I HATE mornings and although I'm often up at 8:30 I'm not awake normally, except on Wednesday's for PWOC), so getting up early is not my idea of a good time to say the least.

I know that what ever is going on, GOD already knows about it and it's in his hands and Jack will be taken care of. Will you take a moment though and pray for him, pray that what ever these bumps are they're nothing serious, and pray for me? I'm still a momma whose little man has something odd going on his foot.
Thank you and God Bless

Wednesday, September 09, 2009

New addition

Meet Bentley! We got him Monday night, from a friend. He's 4 months old, he's a black cocker spaniel. We just love him to pieces!!!